Lessons From the “World’s Best Cannoli”

Posted on May 6, 2010 by Avish

holding cannoliHave you ever been sucked in by marketing hype? Don’t be embarrassed if you have – I have too, even when I knew exactly what was going on…

This past weekend I was out of town running some errands with a friend. We had some time to kill so we walked up and down the “main street” type road that had lots of small businesses on it.

At one point we came across a bakery that had the following sign in the window:

cannoli sign

World’s Best Cannoli? Hmm, intriguing. I really like cannolis. They are probably in my top three favorite desserts.

What’s interesting is that we had just finished a big lunch, and I really wasn’t hungry. Also, I had seen the bakery from a distance as we approached, and though the thought of walking in crossed my mind, I didn’t really a feel a strong desire to get anything.

But, once I saw the “World’s Best Cannoli” sign, I suddenly thought to myself, “well then, I must try one of these cannolis.

This led me to the first thing I learned that day:

Hyperbole Works

The sign said, “World’s Best,” so I figured I had to try it. Of course, there was no attribution on the sign. It didn’t say, “according to Food and Wine Magazine,” or “Voted Best Cannoli on ItalianDesserts.com.” Nope. The entire sign had just three words: “World’s Best Cannoli.” Basically, it was just the owner saying “hey, our cannolis are the best in the world.!”

Did I believe that the owner had gone on an exhaustive worldwide cannoli tasting tour, after which he objectively concluded that his was, in fact, the world’s best? No, of course not. I figured it was much more likely that they guy had never traveled further then 25 miles away from is home in his entire life, but I still felt compelled to try his cannoli (that sounds far dirtier than it should…).

We go into the store, and when the woman behind the counter asks if she can help me I ask, “do you, in fact, have the world’s best cannoli?”

The woman glances around and says, “honestly? No.”

This led me to the second thing I learned that day:

It’s Good To Get Your Entire Team On Board With Your Branding And Marketing

This woman clearly was not the owner. Or, if she was, she was definitely not the person who put the sign in the window (which would be a weird thing for an owner to not have control over). If you want to market yourself as having “the world’s best cannoli,” you may want to make sure everyone in you organization or group is behind that plan. Otherwise your team will be undercutting your efforts.

I was not expecting her to tell me it wasn’t the world’s best, but at this point I was much well down the path to cannoli craving land…

“Hmm, well, is the cannoli still good?”

“Oh yeah, it’s good.”

Excellent. I bought the cannoli and went outside to eat it.

Was the cannoli good? Yes. World's Best? Not so much...

Was the cannoli good? Yes. World's Best? Not so much...

I took my first bite and my friend asks, “so, is it the world’s best cannoli?”

No. No it was not.

“No. It’s really good, but it’s not the world’s best. It’s not even the best cannoli I’ve ever eaten.”

At this point I realized I was really enjoying this cannoli. Rather than being disappointed that it wasn’t the greatest cannoli ever, I was just enjoying it for what it was: a solidly tasty baked treat.

This led me to the third thing I learned that day:

Expectations Matter

I think The bakery counter woman telling me that this was not the world’s best cannoli lowered my expectations. I was expecting to be disappointed, so when I tried it and it was actually good, I was pleasantly surprised. If I had gone in to the bakery and just ordered the cannoli without asking the woman about it, and then eaten it hoping to taste the world’s best, I think I would have had a very different evaluation of it.

Same cannoli, different expectations, different results.

While one of my earlier points was that the business owner should get his or her employees on the same page, I actually benefited from her honesty. And in some ways, so too could her establishment.

This led me to the fourth thing I learned that day:

Honesty Counts

I wasn’t mad that I had been misled by advertising. Not that I would be really fired up over a cannoli, but even though it wasn’t the world’s best I still left there with a favorable impression of the bakery. I probably would not have if I had not have had that exchange with the employee.

I like to ask for recommendations from my server in restaurants, but I often wonder if they are being honest when they tell me what’s good or if they are just trying to steer me to something more expensive or something they were told to “push” by their manager. I really like it when a server honestly tells me what they don’t like. If they highly recommend an expensive item or one of the day’s specials and I get it and don’t like, I am much more likely to feel duped.

(This does remind me of the one time I do feel was misled and got pretty annoyed by it. I was in New York, and my friends and I wanted to see a musical, but we didn’t know which one. The hotel had one of those channels that tells you about all the shows in the city. The ads for “Chicago” said it was a “fun, high energy murder mystery musical.” Well that sounds like fun! Boy was I wrong. You would be hard pressed to find any evidence demonstrating that Chicago was a “murder mystery.” We went in expecting one thing and got…something very, very different. The advertising would have been far more accurate if it had said, “if you don’t like watching hours and hours of Fossey dance numbers, you will quickly want to scratch your own eyes out from sheer boredom.” But I’m not bitter…)

In any case, a little honesty goes a long way. The employee’s honesty helped my experience and allowed me to leave with a good memory of my cannoli. The bakery owner could follow suit and change the sign to “best cannoli in town,” or something else, but he probably won’t. He may very well believe he has the world’s best cannoli. (There’s that confidence thing I talked about in my Why Stupid People Succeed post)

Here are two quick takeaway lessons for you from my experience:

For Businesses: Packaging, Descriptions, Advertising, Etc. Matter

One sign, true or not, was enough to get my attention and get me in the door. In your own business, are your packaging, advertising, and product/service descriptions enticing enough to draw people in? I’m not suggesting you lie, but take some time to make your stuff appealing before people buy from you.

For Consumers: Be Wary Of Packaging

As a consumer, don’t be fooled by flowery words and grand claims. I logically knew that there was no way this would be the world’s best cannoli, but I still wanted to try it. Smart marketers, advertisers, and business owners understand this. As an intelligent consumer, be aware of these tactics and don’t be sucked in by them!

***
conference speakerDo you want your next event to be awesome? Then visit Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!
 

Posted in Business Advice, Motivation & Success | 2 Comments

5 Great 80’s Motivational Songs

Posted on May 5, 2010 by Avish

Van Halen 5150It’s time again to get motivated, 80’s style! That’s right, it’s another list of great motivational 80’s songs! If you need a little “motivational pick me up,” find these songs in your old CD (or tape!) collection, buy them off of iTunes, or just keep watching the YouTube clips I’ve embedded below! They are sure to get you going…

(Note: To keep things fresh, this list does not include any songs from my 5 Great Motivational Songs From 80’s Movies or Funny Motivation: 5 MORE Great Motivational Songs From 80s Movies posts)

Dreams

Van Halen

So baby dry your eyes
Save all the tears you’ve cried
Oh, that’s what dreams are made of
‘Cause we belong in a world that must be strong
Oh, that’s what dreams are made of

Yeah, we’ll get higher and higher
Straight up we’ll climb
Higher and higher
Leave it all behind
Oh, we’ll get higher and higher
Who knows what we’ll find?

This is definitely my favorite song on the list. You can not listen to this song without feeling pumped up. Not only are the lyrics awesome, but the music has that awesome “pumpitude” you want from a good motivational song. This is a great one to work out to.

On a side note, I feel like I am the only person in the world that actually prefers the Sammy Hagar Van Halen to the David Lee Roth Van Halen. Sure, the David Lee Roth era had some great songs, but if I had to pick my top five Van Halen songs they would probably all be from the Hagar years. I know, I know, hardcore Van Halen fans are getting ready to skin me alive right now, but what can I say, I call it like I see it.

Don’t Stop Believin’

Don’t stop believin’
Hold on to that feelin’

This is another good high energy motivational song. Though to be fair, it’s mostly the second half that’s motivational. In the first half of the song, Steve Perry never says, “Don’t Stop Believin’.” In the second half, that’s pretty much all he says. To be honest, I’m not sure the first half is so motivational; the song never actually lets you know whether the “small town girl” and “city boy” ever achieved their dreams. Ok, now I feel a little bummed…

So let’s focus on the second half. When they launch into the high energy “Don’t Stop, Believin'” over and over again, it definitely hits you right in the motivational bone. This is a great one to listen to if you start to feel down about what you’re doing.

If you’re unfamiliar with the song and can’t watch the YouTube clip, just go any karaoke bar in the Philly/South Jersey area. You’ll be sure to hear it sung at least three times a night. Badly. And almost always by a group of at least five women. Who just finished singing “Living on a Prayer,” by Bon Jovi (which is a song that could have made the list until you realize it’s not that motivational, since it’s about two incredibly unsuccessful people holding on to their past dreams while their lives fall apart around them. We never find out if they actually make it. Heck, Bon Jovi even says, “it doesn’t make a difference if we make it or not.” Hmm, maybe I need to write another post about, “80’s songs that are almost motivational. But I digress…)

Simply the Best


You’re simply the best
Better than all the rest
Better than anyone

There always has to be one song I’m a little embarrassed to put on the list, and this time it’s Tina Turner’s Simply the Best. It’s not a great song, but does it get better than someone saying to you, over and over, “You’re simply the best”? (well, yes, it does, but that would be someone saying to you, over and over, “you’re the best, around, nothing’s going to ever keep you down.” But that was covered in a previous 80’s song post, so for now we’ll go with Tina)

This is just a great “affirmation” type song. If you ever feel like you’re not the best, give this song a listen. Tina will convince you.

What’s weird is that the original video shows her dancing with a horse. Not sure why, but she’s dancing with a horse. Maybe she’s not dancing with the horse, but she’s dancing and there’s also a horse in the video. Was she saying the horse was the best? Or was the horse a metaphor for something? Sadly, I couldn’t find an embedable YouTube clip with the original horse dancing. (I can only assume the SPCA had something to do with that) so to see the horse you’ll have to watch it on YouTube

Break My Stride


Ain’t nothing gonna break my stride
Nobody gonna slow me down, oh no
I got to keep on moving
Ain’t nothing gonna break my stride
I’m running in a one touch ground, oh no
I got to keep on moving

This is not exactly a “load 250 pounds on the bar and go for a bench press record” type of motivational song. However, it’s a great song to listen to while walking. I guess the “ain’t nothing gonna break my stride,” part ties into the walking nicely. Whenever I listen to this song while walking down the streets of Philly, i can’t help but feel empowered.

Of course, if you were to read the full lyrics, you might think that this is not a very motivational song at all. In fact, it sounds like it’s about a guy who is pursuing a girl who is rejecting him by saying that she doesn’t want to be tied down. And then he basically says he won’t be with another girl who will treat him that way. So maybe this should also be with “Living on a Prayer” on the “almost motivational songs” list.

Ah well…the chorus is so infectious and sounds so positive, I’ll choose blissful ignorance on this one.

(by the way, the video above is the first time I have ever seen what Matthew Wilder looks like. Is it me, or does he look like John Oaters and Gallagher had a love child…?)

Eye of the Tiger

So many times, it happens too fast
You change your passion for glory
Don’t lose your grip on the dreams of the past
You must fight just to keep them alive

(By the way, the chorus is “It’s the eye of the tiger, it’s the thrill of the fight.” One website has the lyrics as, “It’s the eye of the tiger / its the cream of the fight” That’s just wrong. And weird. And a little dirty.)

I know, this may be a little bit of a cheat since I did include “Hearts on Fire” from Rocky IV on another list. But come on! Can you get a better “motivate me and pump me up song” than “Eye of the Tiger”? This song is so awesome it was not only used as the Rocky III theme song, but was also the music that Hulk Hogan used to come to the ring to! See for yourself:

If it’s good enough for the Hulkster, it’s good enough for me!

Hulk Hogan or not, Rocky or not, “Eye of the Tiger” is just a straight up great motivational song. Whether you’re working out, trying to get psyched to work on a project, or just need to pick yourself up after a setback, you can’t go wrong with “Eye of the Tiger.”

As usual with these lists, I’m sure I missed some songs. Feel free to add your own in the comments section!

P.S. Hey, if you like this content, why don’t you share the love and click the Facebook “Like” button at the top of the page…?

***
conference speakerAre you planning an event and looking for a great speaker to add humor and energy? Then visit Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!
 

Posted in Lists, Motivation & Success | Tagged | 8 Comments

These Units Are For Buying…

Posted on May 4, 2010 by Avish

real estateSome people just don’t get it. Whether they are in sales, service, or just existing in the world, some people just straight up don’t get it…

A few years ago my friend was looking to rent an apartment outside of Washington D.C. After a few hours of looking he came across an apartment that was for sale. He wasn’t particularly interested in buying, but he had a good job, and so he figured he could at least take a look.

He walks up to the door where he is greeted by a real estate agent. She takes one look at him and says, “these units are for buying.” Then she closes the door.

Oh Snap!

You may be thinking, “well, maybe she didn’t want to waste her time on someone who wasn’t a serious prospect. Wasn’t she just qualifying her leads?”

I could see how you would think that. But then you have to remember that he hadn’t even opened his mouth yet! This was a few years ago when he was just out of college, but still, that’s kind of ridiculous.

Here are three lessons our rude real estate agent could take away from this:

Never Assume

How does that old saying go? If you assume, you make an ass out of yourself. And not a Smart Ass.

How does that old saying go? If you assume, you make an ass out of yourself. And not a Smart Ass (or something like that)


It’s easy to make giant assumptions and judge people based on a quick look. People are so overwhelmed that they feel compelled to quickly judge and remove things to keep their plate clear. But assumptions are a great way to get into trouble and miss out on opportunities.

My friend wasn’t actually a buyer. But she didn’t know that, she just assumed it based on his age and look. In this case she may have been right. But in how many cases would she be wrong? Keep in mind, this was in the late 90s during the Dot Com boom; a 22 year old millionaire would not have been that shocking. Also, some people look younger then they are. And some very wealthy people don’t feel the need to dress up. (For example, I have a friend who is very successful who can often be seen wearing Hawaiian shirts and Mickey Mouse watches. If you judged him by that, you could miss out on a big sale (and commission))

There’s nothing wrong with qualifying your leads. Just do it intelligently.

Think Long Term

Try to think about the future...

Try to think about the future...


My friend didn’t want to buy a place at that time. Does that mean he would never buy a place? Probably not. Definitely not, I suppose, since he does now own a nice two bedroom condo apartment. Could she have kept in touch and cultivated that relationship until he was ready to buy? Perhaps.

Could my friend have known other people who were looking to buy, or would be in the near future? Perhaps.

Whether either of these two things would have happened or whether it would be worth the effort to stay in touch is a judgement call. But in this real estate agent’s case, it’s a call she would never get to make because she literally closed the door.

Being rude may save you a few minutes in the short term, but think about what you might be throwing away in the long term.

Don’t Be a Jerk

Don't be a jerk.

Don't be a jerk.


Yes, sadly this needs to be said. There are so many reasons to not be a jerk: word of mouth, karma, referrals, relationships, follow-up business, your own stress levels, etc. But for some reason, so many people just resort to rude jerky behavior.

Once in a while you need to play the “jerk card”; there are some people who will respond to nothing less. But that card should be played later, after you have properly determined that it’s needed – not as the very first thing you do, before the other person can even introduce themselves.

The next time you want to write someone off with just a quick look, take a moment to reflect on the rude real estate agent, hear her say, “these units are for buying,” and then remind yourself that you never know…

***
conference speakerAre you planning an event and looking for a great speaker to add humor and energy? Then visit Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!
 

Posted in Business Advice | Tagged , | 1 Comment

What’s Your Story?

Posted on May 3, 2010 by Avish

bookLast week, I wrote a post titled Lessons From My Improv Group (With 20/20 Hindsight) . In it, I mentioned three lessons I learned from my years trying to grow an improv comedy group in Philadelphia:

  1. Set the Quality Bar Higher
  2. Set the “Dream Bar” a Bit Lower
  3. Analyzed Less, Acted More

These are my lessons from my experience (and there are many more lessons and experiences!) The thing is, we all have these experiences. Things that when we look back, we say, “well I would do that differently if I had to do it again.”

So my question to you is, “what’s your story?” What is your specific personal experience that you can look back on and say, “here are three (or five, or seven, or twenty-nine) things anyone could learn from my example”?

I hoped you learned from my experience, but there is no reason you can’t learn from your own. Sadly, it’s quite shocking how many people don’t learn from their own experiences. Instead, they just keep on making the same mistakes, over, and over, and over, and over again.

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result


For me, my three lessons were from things I didn’t properly do in my improv group. Now, in my current business as a Motivational Humorist, I am doing my damndest to incorporate those lessons into my current activities. Simple, but that’s what learning from experience is all about.

So let me ask you: What would you do differently if you could do it all over again? Are you doing those things differently now, in your current life?

If your answer to that second question is “no,” I strongly suggest you take action to start incorporating the lessons from your experiences into your life now…

***
conference speakerAre you planning an event and looking for a great speaker to add humor and energy? Then visit Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!
 

Posted in Motivation & Success | 2 Comments

How Quickly Loyalties Can Change

Posted on April 30, 2010 by Avish

wedding toastI was at a meeting earlier this week and a friend of mine was on the “expert panel.” At one point he says, “I was giving a speech at my brother-in-law’s wedding…”

I happened to be sitting next to his brother-in-law at this moment. I turn to him and say, “interesting that he says he was at his brother-in-law’s wedding and not his SISTER’S wedding.”

It’s amazing how quickly loyalties can change. His sister, who he’s known for 34 years, gets kicked to the curb for his brother-in-law, who he’s known for 2. I wonder if at his parents’ anniversary he will toast, “to my brother-in-law’s niece’s grandparents – cheers!”

Well done, friend. Well done.

No lesson here. This story just tickled me pink.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go write an email to my friend’s sister letting her know about her familial hierarchical displacement.

***
conference speakerAre you planning an event and looking for a great speaker to add humor and energy? Then visit Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!
 

Posted in Just Funny | Leave a comment

Five Don’ts of Using “Free” Without Being a Jerk

Posted on April 29, 2010 by Avish

mime stopWouldn’t you love it if you could get someone to do something for you for free? Wouldn’t that be awesome? Well yes, it would! The problem is that some people, when being fortunate enough to convince someone to do something for free, just don’t know how to handle it properly…

Over the years, I have done some free (or as we like to say, “no-fee” work). Everyone has. It may have been when I was starting out, just to get my name out there and get some practice, or for a cause I cared about, or to speak to a new industry I really wanted to break into, or just as a favor to a friend.

Having done quite a few of those, I have learned a thing or two about how people act when they get someone to do something for free. Sadly, some people just love to smack a gift horse in the mouth and come across like big jerks, even though you are doing them a favor by not charging (it can be so bad at times that some colleagues refuse to do anything for free simply because they feel they are more likely to be treated poorly. Crazy!)

But this is not just my experience! I have chatted with friends and colleagues about this issue. Not just other speakers, but people from many different fields such as graphic design, music, IT, and more. From these conversations, I have come up with the five “Don’ts” of taking advantage of free services without being a jerk. Please refer to these if you are fortunate enough to have someone offer their services to you at no charge (for whatever reason).

(Note: yes, there is a flip side – “how to properly deliver when you’re doing it for free,” because some people do a bad job wen they are not getting paid. But that will be the focus of another post…)

Don’t Be Mean

Come on, you're getting free stuff! Would it hurt you to smile?

Come on, you're getting free stuff! Would it hurt you to smile?


You would think that if you are gracious enough to waive your fee for someone that they would fall all over themselves being nice to you. While this does happen quite often, every so often you get some nasty person who just treats you like dirt. And not that fancy soft cleansing dirt. Nope. They just treat you like garden variety, scrape off the bottom of your shoe, dirt.

I think people should be nice, respectful, and polite to everyone they encounter. Why this even has to be said in terms of being nice to someone who is offering you something for free, I don’t know. But it does.

Don’t Be Too Demanding

I don't care that I got this to you this morning, two weeks late. I want my free stuff now!

I don't care that I got this to you this morning, two weeks late. I want my free stuff now!


Keep in mind, you’re not paying anything. Yes, you want the best quality results you can get, but you do get what you pay for. Demanding rush jobs is completely unfair. Especially if the huge rush is because of your own damned fault. (i.e. “poor planning on your part does not constitute and emergency on my part.” Doubly true if I am doing it for free and you give me no warning!).

Similarly, expecting numerous rewrites and edits, giving painstaking feedback, micro managing, and requiring excessive amounts of emails, updates, and paperwork is just wrong. Be accommodating and flexible and everyone will be much happier.

Don’t Exaggerate

I once caught a fish that was this big...yeah right

I once caught a fish that was this big...yeah right


Anyone who’s every done a free gig of any nature knows of what I speak here. People love to exaggerate the benefit you will get if you do something for free for them.

I get solicited to speak for free because “it will be great exposure.” Then they tell me how many people will be in the audience, how many potential clients will be there, and how great the whole experience will be. Every time I have done that, I find that the audience is much smaller than what I was told. With a very small number of potential clients.

It’s gotten to a point that when I have these types of conversations I automatically cut whatever estimated attendance they tell me in half. “Oh, you think 200 people will be there?” I instantly envision a room with 100 people. This method has rarely been wrong.

There is a strong urge, when trying to convince someone to give you something for free (or even reduced fee) to try to make it as enticing as possible. But please, resist the urge to exaggerate expectations! It will just make you look very, very bad. And make me much less likely to help you again in the future.

This isn’t just for speakers. Service providers get this all the time too. “Oh, you’re stuff will be in front of hundreds of potential clients who can hire you.” Maybe, or maybe it’s just one potential client and fifty people who like free food. I am just saying…

Don’t Lie

Yeah, that's the ticket...

Yeah, that's the ticket...


Sad to say, but some people will go one step beyond exaggeration into full on lying. Don’t do this. If I have to explain why, then get off my blog now and never come back.

Don’t Forget

Adieu, adieu...remember me...

Adieu, adieu...remember me...


Here’s a sad truth I have discovered over the years: people are really busy and tend to focus on what’s important to them in that moment. What this means is that while you are working for someone, for free or for money, they are totally engaged with you during the course of the project (i.e. while they need you). Then, once the project is over, they may very well disappear.

That is, during the project you may get email contacts from them every day. Afterward, when you want to follow up with them and see how things went and talk about the possibility of future paid work or referrals, they suddenly drop off the radar and don’t reply. Then, two weeks later, you’ll get an email, “oh, I’m sorry, things have been sooo busy. Maybe we can chat next week :-)” (p.s. their use of the “smiley face” there doesn’t make the situation less annoying. Just FYI.) Of course, “next week” never comes. Now that they no longer need you they are too busy to chat. It’s really kind of ridiculous.

This isn’t hugely offensive when you have been paid, because there was an equal exchange of money for services. Any extra follow up is bonus. But when you have waived your fee…

Don’t forget about the people who have done stuff for you for free! Return their emails. Take their calls. Have honest conversations with them about future paid work. Keep them in mind for referrals and leads.

This is how relationships are built. Plus, it’s karma. Plus, I’m betting somewhere during your initial conversations you alluded to the possibility of future work and referrals. Now’s the time to pony up. To not do so is to be dishonest.

To be honest, I have had some wonderful experiences speaking pro bono, many decent experiences, and a few really bad ones. I don’t want to give the impression that all people who get free stuff are jerks; most aren’t. But enough of them are that I wanted to write this post for you to read and share in hopes that in the future, all people who offer something for free will have a tremendously awesome experience!

P.S. I don’t want you to go reading this post assuming I will speak to your group for free! I don’t do too many of those, so I probably won’t (i.e. you would have work hard to convince me that it’s a real good fit). But, if you would like to talk about hiring me to speak for your group, then check out my Motivational Humorist page now!

Posted in Business Advice | Leave a comment

When Policy Meets Stupidity – From Hero to “You’re Fired!”

Posted on April 28, 2010 by Avish

donald_trump*sigh* Yet again, life throws us a story of policy meeting stupidity…

Here’s a story about two good Samaritans who helps a middle aged mall security guard catch a shoplifter. Their reward? They got fired from their jobs! Take a read:

Sprint Employees Fired For Capturing Shoplifter

In a nutshell, two employees at a mall Sprint store were on a break when they heard a mall security guard call out for help. They then saw the suspect run past him so they chased him down and held him until mall security and the police arrived. A couple of days later they were informed by Sprint that the company has a policy stating that employees shouldn’t confront thieves. The next day they were called into separate meeting where they were both fired.

Amazing.

Evidently, Sprint doesn’t have a policy that employees should not be fired for stupid reasons.

Don't help this guy out, or you might get fired...

Don't help this guy out, or you might get fired...


I can understand the policy from a “don’t confront thieves in the store” perspective. With the way our litigious society works, if a Sprint employee were to confront a thief in a Sprint store and the thief got injured, I am guessing he would sue (I think that’s stupid, but don’t tell me it wouldn’t happen).

But if you look at the various factors, doesn’t a firing seem extreme?

  1. The incident took place outside of the store, in the mall
  2. The incident took place while the guys were on break
  3. It didn’t involve the Sprint store or the theft of Sprint equipment
  4. The guys have worked their for a while; one for four years, one for six
  5. The guys claim to have never been informed of this policy, even in manager training
  6. The article (as related by the guys in the story) doesn’t have a clear consequence of action or termination if they do confront a thief.

So really, firing?? Does that seem right? How about a reprimand, or a day or two suspension? (though even that to me seems dumb). How about a nice, “listen, what you did was very well meaning and helpful, but we have this policy that like to broadly apply to inappropriate situations, so don’t do it again”?

Talk about shooting yourself in the foot with PR. That Sprint store would have gotten a ton of press and lots of people just stopping by to see the guys. Now the stories will all basically be, “Sprint is Stupid.”

Shouldn’t these guys be applauded, if for nothing else but their good intentions? (Interestingly, this is almost the exact same scenario that led to Peter Parker becoming Spiderman. if they had let the thief get away, then perhaps one of their Uncle Bens’ would have been shot. I guess Sprint execs need to bone up on their Spiderman comics…)

I am not sure if this is a case of “when policy meets stupidity,” since there doesn’t seem to be a clear cut policy here. Maybe it’s a case of “when executives meet stupidity.” Or just a case of “stupidity.”

I don’t know, maybe I am missing something. What do you think? Is the firing justified, or is this yet another case of “when policy meets stupidity”?

You tell me: good policy or just stupidity?

You tell me: good policy or just stupidity?

Posted in Business Advice | 3 Comments

Are You More Emotionally Mature Than a Sixth Grader?

Posted on April 27, 2010 by Avish

madkidLet’s be honest: no one expects a sixth grader to be all that emotionally mature. Some are, but many aren’t. However, if you observe the behavior of a sixth grader, you may find some examples of things that many adults unfortunately do as well…

I have a friend who teaches middle school. For this article, let’s call her “Ms. G.”

Ms. G. was teaching one day when two students got in an argument. One student complained that the other had taken her pencil, while the other student denied the thievery.

Ms. G., not sure who to believe, but understanding that this shouldn’t be a big deal, made sure that both girls still had pencils to write with, asked them to stop arguing and move on to more productive things. Sadly, she may have misunderstood how important stupid things like that can be to a twelve year old…

The alleged victim continued to complain, at which point Ms. G. told her that if she didn’t stop she would get in trouble. The girl managed to keep quiet for a few minutes (a Herculean feat in and of itself, I am sure) but eventually started complaining again.

Ms. G., trying to avoid getting the girl in too much trouble, asked the complainer to step outside to calm down. The girl went outside for a few minutes and then came back in a seemingly calmer mood. Seemingly. But it was not so, for she once again started complaining.

At this point it was too much. Ms. G., after having given multiple chances and warnings, now had to send the girl to the principal’s office. I have never been a teacher, but it seems the logical way to do that is to say the student, “go to the principal’s office.” This is what Ms. G. did. So what did the girl do? Nothing. She did not, in fact, go to the principal’s office.

At her wits’ end, Ms. G. did the only thing she could: she called the principal to her room to come get the student himself. Again, I’m not a teacher, but I understand that in the grand scale of “middle school trouble escalation,” having to have the principal come to the classroom to collect you is pretty bad.

As she was being taken away to the principal’s office, the girl says, “Ms. G., I don’t know why you made such a big deal about this, it was just a pencil.”

Ms. G., somehow managing not to let her head explode (a Herculean feat in and of itself, I am sure) replies, “this is not about the pencil. I gave you many chances to let it go, but you had to keep complaining about it. And because you couldn’t stop, you ruined your day.”

True words, and a good lesson. I hope the student learned from it, but I somehow doubt it…

It’s easy to read this story and just shake your head at the immaturity of today’s youth. But there are definitely things we can all learn from the example of Ms. G.’s pencil stealing incident. You may never ruin your entire day over someone taking your pencil, but everyone has moments where they fail to act as emotionally mature as possible.

Here are three things you can do to make sure that you stay more emotionally mature than a sixth grader:

Keep Perspective

Take it from Bogie: Your problems don't amount to a hill of beans...

Take it from Bogie: Your problems don't amount to a hill of beans...


As an adult, keeping a sense of perspective is important. How often have you seen someone (or you) get disproportionately angry or upset over something inconsequential? Someone “steals” the parking spot you were waiting for – sure, that sucks, but is it worth jumping out of your car and yelling at the person through his window? Someone accidentally bumps you and spills some of your beer – bummer, but is it worth getting in a fight over? Someone off-handedly says something rude – they may be stupid, but is it worth you wasting your day obsessing or crying over it?

Of course not. This is what emotionally immature children do. Sadly, more than a handful of adults act this way too.

Keeping perspective is about having an appropriate emotional response. Keep that in mind the next time you or someone you know starts flipping out over something inconsequential.

Let Things Go

Just let it go...

Just let it go...


This is perhaps the master skill of emotional maturity. People with high levels of stress and anger can just never seem to let anything go. It doesn’t matter if it’s letting something small go in a few minutes or holding on to a grudge for years.

In this story, the student just couldn’t let go of the fact that she had been “wronged.” While sitting in silence, she festered on thoughts of how unfair things were. If she could have just let it go and moved on, it would have worked out better for everyone.

I’m not saying that you have to forgive everyone who does something to you. But you can let things go so they no longer have a hold on you, even if you choose to never forgive (though in most cases, forgiveness is a good thing to do, simply for the freeing effect it will have on you).

It may be a bit much to expect a 12 year-old to “let it go.” As adults, however, we should all not only have the ability to let things go, but we should practice that ability with great frequency.

Forsee the Consequences of the Path You Are On

A little foresight goes a long way.

A little foresight goes a long way.


For some reason, so many people, young and old, start down a path and then are shocked when they get in trouble for it.

You know, the person who argues and gets belligerent with a police officer and then is shocked when they get arrested. The employee who repeatedly shows up late and then is stunned when he gets fired. And yes, the student who keeps acting up in class and then is appalled when they get sent to the principal’s office. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

You don’t have to Nostradamus to look two minutes into the future and see the trouble coming.

Sadly, many people never take a split second to pause and think about where their current actions are leading. They just keep on ranting and raving and complaining and ultimately end up screwing themselves over.

A little emotional maturity and foresight can go a long way to heading off a lot of problems.

The next time you find yourself acting up in any way, take a look at that list and ask yourself, “are you more emotionally mature than a middle schooler?”

***
conference speakerAre you planning an event and looking for a great speaker to add humor and energy? Then visit Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!
 

Posted in Motivation & Success | 4 Comments

Lessons From my Improv Group (with 20/20 Hindsight)

Posted on April 26, 2010 by Avish

Ah, the beauty of hindsight! It is so easy to look back at what you have done and say, “D’oh!” I would do that differently now…

This past weekend I attended a meeting of the National Speakers Association Philadelphia Chapter where we learned all about publicity and PR. The speaker, Jill Lublin, told us to come up with our own “personal story,” as interestingly enough, that is the kind of stuff that can hook the press in.

This got me thinking about what my story is (to be fair, we all have many stories, so I was mostly thinking of my speaking business story). How did I get here? What has happened in my life that had brought me to this point.

A few minutes later I had my first draft of what I thought might be an interesting personal story. Take a look:

Immediately after college, I turned my back on a four year Ivy league computer engineering degree to start my own improv comedy group that would one day be a huge Philadelphia institution. That failed. But, I had fun, learned a lot of things along the way about business and life, and wouldn’t be where I am today without it. Would I do it again? Yup. Would I do some things differently? Absolutely.

That’s not the greatest press hook ever written, but it’s a start.

But the point of this post is not “how to craft a brilliant personal story.” The point is that coming up with that story and the last two questions really got me thinking: what would I do differently if I could do it (go back and start my own improv group) all over again?

Probably a lot. For now, I will share three critically important ones with you. I think you might be able to take something away from them for yourself…

(On a random side note, I have a big pet peeve when successful people are asked “what would you do differently” and they say, “nothing. All my mistakes were important to getting me here.” Well, duh! We’re not stupid, we understand that all people are the results of their experiences and that every failure is an opportunity to learn and that there is not point dwelling on past mistakes. But since the question asker doesn’t have a time machine that you can step into and actually change the past, stop worrying about the hypothetical butterfly affect and be intelligent enough to understand that the spirit of the question is “what can we learn from your mistakes.” Dumbasses.)

But I digress..here are three things I would do differently if I got to do it all over again:

Set the Quality Bar Higher

I have written about this before, and it bears repeating. Looking back, I would have been way more focused on improving the quality (mine and the rest of my group) of the improv performance.

I am pretty sure I and my fellow performers were good. But “good enough” rarely is.

Though it might have made things a tad less fun in rehearsals, I would have been more of a hard-ass about getting the highest quality performance out of every performer, every time. In the long run, that would have made a huge difference.

Question: Are you setting your own “quality bar” high enough?

Set the “Dream Bar” a Bit Lower

Don’t get me wrong = I’m a “motivational” type guy, so I am all about the big dreams. If i had to go back and do it all over again, I would still have big long term dreams, but rather than obsessing about those I would keep those in mind while focusing on smaller short term dreams.

Rather than worrying about getting my own theater space where we could perform 5 nights a week, I would simply focus on selling out a fifty person theater once a week. Instead of daydreaming about getting on national TV, I would work hard on filling the dream of getting good local press.

This “dream shrinking” would do two things: 1) it would make the tasks seem much more manageable and achievable, and hence less overwhelming, and 2) since they would be easier to achieve, they would create tremendous positive momentum.

Not having done that effectively, it became easy to get discouraged, which is not a good thing.

Question: Are you setting your “dream bar” at a point where you can avoid overwhelm and build positive momentum?

Analyzed Less, Acted More

You can judge for yourself whether you think I am smart, but I at least like to think of myself as an intellectual. What that means is that I love to think about stuff, and analyze it, read about it, and understand it.

For a while during my time running my improv group, I spent lots of time learning about business plans, marketing theories, copy writing, etc. I would spend hours trying to figure out how to write a great as that would drive people to our doors, and what exactly our market segment was, and how to write a great headline for our website.

What’s wrong with those things? Nothing. Those are all good things to do. In retrospect however, if I had taken 90% of the time I spent doing that stuff and instead just printed up some simple but nice looking flyers and stood on the street corner (or hired someone to stand on the corner) handing them out, I am pretty confident we would have gotten better results.

Thinking is awesome (pretty much all my posts are about this in one way or another). Taking action without some thought is sheer idiocy. However, over-thinking and over-analyzing are almost as bad as not thinking at all. Ten out ten times, the person who takes action will beat the person who sits there and does nothing but think and analyze.

Question: Are you trapping with yourself with “analysis paralysis” when a little action is all you need?

There you have it. Three little things that I would do differently if I had to do it all over again:

  1. Set the Quality Bar Higher
  2. Set the “Dream Bar” a Bit Lower
  3. Analyzed Less, Acted More

I encourage you to take a look at what you are trying to do with your life right now and see if these three things could apply to you. If at all possible, I would love it if you could learn from my experience…

***
conference speakerAre you planning an event and looking for a great speaker to add humor and energy? Then visit Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!
 

Posted in Business Advice, Improv Comedy, Motivation & Success | 6 Comments

There is Stupidity in the World…But There Too is Politeness

Posted on April 23, 2010 by Avish

walletI recently came across two stories, one that happened to a friend that shows how annoying some people can be, and one that happened to me that shows how people can still be thoughtful and polite. It was an interesting juxtaposition.

There is Stupidity in the World…

My friend Denise posted this Facebook update this week:

…found someone’s wallet at the register in IKEA yesterday and returned it to him. The words “thank you” were barely out of his mouth when his girlfriend told him to “make sure she didn’t take your debit card.” She being me, of course. Seriously, if I had taken the debit card would I have actually returned his wallet to him??

Wow. That smacks of utter dumbassery.

I get it: some people steal. But Denise is right, why would she hand the wallet back in person if she stole the debit card? And how about a little gratitude?! And how about not being rude right in the face of the person who just saved your ass a ton of annoying time having to cancel and reapply for credit cards, drivers license, etc.?!?

Some people are just distrustful of the world. And rude. And stupid. Bob Barker should champion a campaign to have people like that neutered.
bobbarker

…But There Too is Politeness

On the other hand, I had a nice little exchange a few days ago.

I went to the bank to deposit a check (always the best reason to go the bank!). I fill out the deposit slip and stand in line to await the next teller. At this point I am the only one in line, but then I look down and realize that I forgot to write down my account number on the deposit slip. I hop out of line, grab a pen, and quickly write my number on the slip. When I return to the line, a woman has gotten in front of me.

No problem, I am fully aware that I stepped out of line so I stand behind her.

She immediately turns and says, “you can get in front of me.”

I say, “no that’s fine, I’m not in a rush.”

She replies, “no, you were here first, you just had to quickly fix something. Please, you can go.”

Wow. That was very sweet. I warmly said, “thank you very much, I appreciate that,” and accepted her kindness and got in front of her. (some of you may feel that since she was a woman, and older than me, that I should have insisted that she go first. Well, I have a low tolerance for the repeated back and forth, “‘you go,’ ‘no you go,’ ‘no I insist, you go'” type game. If you keep pushing, I’ll give in. Two times is enough. Get off my case….)

I left there feeling very happy with that interaction. It was a tiny little thing and had very little impact on my day or life, but it just made me feel good about people, especially since I seem to see (and write about) so much rude behavior in the world.

A little politeness goeas a long way

A little politeness goeas a long way


There are three lessons I’d like to point out from these two simple stories:

Don’t Repay Kindness With a Smack in the Face
If someone does something nice to you (like return your lost wallet), don’t be a dumbass to them. There’s nothing wrong checking your wallet and making sure everything is there (even if my friend hadn’t stolen anything, it’s possible someone else had or something had fallen out), but take a second and think things through and apply a little logic. And be nice to the person who did something nice to you. And don’t be rude. Or stupid. Or I’ll mock you for it.

If you think about it, in the story above, even if Denise had stolen the guy’s debit card, a) she couldn’t do much with it without the PIN, b) he could just go cancel it, which would mean having to cancel only one card instead of an entire wallet’s worth. Either way, the dude comes out ahead.

Practice Small Acts of Kindness
The woman in the bank would have been 100% in the right to not let me in front of her; I had jumped out of line. But she did something nice because she felt it was right, and that made me feel good. On some level, I’m sure it made her feel good too. The world needs more of that.

Hold someone’s place in line. Smile at the strangers you meet. Hold a door open for someone. Do something nice and spread the kindness. It’s easy, and it’s good.

There is Both Good and Bad in the World
You find what you look for. I notice a lot of the stupid rude stuff because it makes me laugh and I can write and speak about it. But I really love seeing the good stuff, because it seems rare and it makes me feel good (plus, I can write about that too). I would like nothing more than to spend a day out and encounter nothing but kind, polite, nice people and great service. That may not happen, but good behavior and great service exist; you just have to keep an eye out for it.

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