The World Wants You to be Stupid: The Headline Fallacy!

packers-tieBelieving everything you read is a bad idea. But what’s much, much worse is believing everything you read when you don’t take the time to read all that much…

You may have seen a story last week that had the following headline:

Man Fired for Wearing Packers Tie

I don’t know about you, but when I see that headline, I assume that

  1. A man wore a Packers tie to work
  2. That was the reason he got fired.

I have a vision of a dude walking into work with a tie, his boss seeing it, and yelling, “You’re fired!” Like a ridiculous Donald Trump caricature, which is saying a lot, since Donald Trump is already a ridiculous caricature.

Makes sense, right? (I mean, “it makes sense that I would think that’s what the story;s about.”. The firing doesn’t seem to make any sense at all).

If you continue and read the little blurbs (in the Google results) or the first sentence or two of most articles, you’ll see that the story is about a Chicago man who wore a Green Bay Packers tie to his job in Chicago the day after the Packers beat the Chicago Bears in the NFC championship game and was subsequently fired.

When I first saw that, I felt outraged. “Why are people so stupid? How can people take sports that seriously that they would fire someone for wearing a tie supporting the opposing team??”

Then I actually clicked a few of the links and read the articles, and I discovered that there was a little more to the story…

If you read more, you discover a few things:

  1. The man is a car salesman. He is in a line of work where his success is very much related to his ability to not piss potential buyers off. Regardless of whether it’s a fireable offense,, it certainly seems like a bad idea.
  2. The man was an employee. If you are in business for yourself and want to do things to turn off potential customers, that is entirely your decision. If you sell for someone else though, there’s more to think about than your own numbers.
  3. The car dealership spent thousands of dollars on a Bears advertising campaign. It seems bad form for the dealership to have people supporting the other team when you’ve got a whole campaign around the home team.
  4. The man was asked to remove the tie five times. It turns out he didn’t just walk in and his boss, immediately upon seeing him wearing a Green Bay Packers tie, said, “you’re fired!” No, he was told the tie could hurt sales and was told repeatedly to take it off.
  5. He said “no” – repeatedly. I am not an employment lawyer, nor do I play one on TV,, but to me, firing an employee for refusing to follow a simple instruction that would help business seems justifiable, at least in a legal sense.

Frankly, I think both sides were in the wrong here. Wearing the tie seems to be a bad move, but he was a fan and he also said he was wearing it to honor his grandmother. Refusing to follow his boss’s instructions, however, seems to constitute insubordination, which is really dumb to do over a minor request. On the other hand, firing the guys seems a little extreme. There had to be some middle ground between firing and letting him have his way, right?

Rather than go on about the bad decisions both parties made, I’d instead like to focus on the way it was all reported.

I, for one, am starting to get sick of headlines that mislead in an effort to get people to click through or read more.

This is another case where the world wants you to be stupid

stupid man face

Sorry if that offends you, but if you take a course in writing copy, articles, or blog posts, you’ll see the same bits of advice over and over:

  • People don’t like long blocks of text
  • People like bullets
  • People like sections broken up by headlines and sub-headlines
  • And so on…

In short, writing is done to appease people who like scan. Headlines are designed to get a scanner to stop, take note, and click a link, buy a paper, or read more.

As such, many headlines like to “position the truth” in the most eye catching manner possible.

“Man fired for wearing Packers tie,”

Is way more enticing than

“Man fired for saying “no” to his boss five times”

This would not be a huge problem if everyone were to go on and actually read the article or get more information. But people don’t. They read the headlines and maybe the top blurb (also written for the primary purpose of hooking attention) and then move on.

You may say, “That’s crazy, people don’t do that!” But how many times have you been in a conversation with someone who quotes a fact they saw in the news or in an article., but when you ask them questions about it, it becomes clear that they just saw a headline? How many times have you done that yourself?

Frankly, in this day and age you get so overloaded with information that it’s easier to just read a headline and two sentences and assume that you have the facts. But that doesn’t make it right.

Media outlets, especially biased news and opinion shows and websites, constantly use this to their advantage. By tweaking verbiage they can walk right up to the edge of telling a lie without crossing over. They know most people will simply take what they say at face value and never dig deeper.

Don’t fall for it! Don’t get sucked in to the headline fallacy!

If you’re going to take something as true (especially if you are going to make decisions based on that belief), do your research. Read the full text. Follow up a little on big claims. Take responsibility. And don’t let people get away with wanting you to be stupid!

***
Motivational Humorist Avish ParasharAre you planning an event and looking for a great speaker to add humor and energy? Then visit Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!
 

Posted in Motivation & Success | Tagged | 3 Comments

Tech Gets You Hired, Soft Skills Get You Fired

nerd manI was sent an article by my friend and fellow speaker Steve Coscia. Steve’s a rock star when it comes to teaching customer service skills to contractors, HVAC organizations, and other trade professionals.

He was quoted in this article, which is all about the importance of soft skills for IT professionals. You can read the article here:

The Soft Skills You Need to Succeed in a Software Career

I am posting this link for a few reasons:

  1. The article makes a good point. Steve’s quote in particular stands out: “Technical skills usually get a person hired, but the lack of soft skills is what usually gets them fired.” Even if it doesn’t get them fired, it can hold back their careers or make their lives more difficult than they need to be.
  2. The point is true in most industries, not just IT. Obviously, technical proficiency is important. But solid soft skills can make your life easier and your career progress much faster. This is true in just about every service industry. Even if you don’t work in IT, you can take something from the article.
  3. Blatant self-promotion. I come from the IT world (IT degree, IT work experience in both startups and the Fortune 100). I know IT, and I have presented on this topic – soft skills for IT professionals – before. I even have a website up for this topic: Simple IT Success. All that to say, if you agree with the points in the article and you or your IT team could use some help in this area, contact me now.

Moving beyond the self promotion, take a look at your own level of “soft skill competency.” You don’t need to transform into an ass-kissing schmoozer or try to be someone you are not, but by improving a few basic skills, such as presenting, listening, giving and taking ideas, letting go of control, etc. you can definitely make your life easier and more successful.

***
Motivational Humorist Avish ParasharWant more info on Avish’s speaking and training programs? Then visit his Motivational Humorist page now!
 

Posted in Business Advice | Tagged | 1 Comment

Two Simple Keys to Business Success

key businessmanLast week, my buddy and fellow speaker (and marketing expert extraordinaire) David Newman posted this on his Facebook wall:

“The two keys to speaking success are _____ and _____”

Obviously readers were supposed to fill in the blanks.

Here’s what I said:

1) Being able to clearly define your “what I do and who I do it for” positioning and

2) Being so friggin’ good that people can’t help but talk about you and refer you afterward

This answer applies to any industry, not just speaking. Obviously there’s more to it (I wrote about a similar topic in a more expanded form in my The Three Simple Keys to Small Business Success: Clarity, Quality, and Marketing post).

But these two are the foundation of business success. When you know with crystal clear clarity what you do and who you do it for, your marketing gets a whole lot easier. When you are so good people can’t help but talk about you and refer, your inbound leads go through the roof.

If you’re a small business owner, entrepreneur, or the person responsible for growing a business, ask yourself, “do I know ‘what I do and who I do it for’?” and “am I so freakin’ good that people can’t help but talk about and refer me (or my products)?”

If the answer to both of those questions is “yes,” then you’re ready for all the cool marketing tactics and tools that everyone loves. If not, you have some serious work to do.

***
Motivational Humorist Avish ParasharWant some help a) developing your target position and b) being so freakin’ good that people can not help but talk about and refer you afterward? Avish can help! Check out his Smart Ass Mentoring Page now!

Posted in Business Advice | 1 Comment

Knock it Out of the Park

seinfeld comedianI don’t much like baseball, but I really like baseball metaphors. So today, I am going to encourage you to do your best to “knock it out of the park.

This idea came to me while watching Comedian, a documentary that follows Jerry Seinfeld after the end of his show, Seinfeld, as he starts his stand-up act over completely from scratch. It’s a very cool movie, and if you have any interest in stand-up comedy (as a performer or observer), I would highly recommend it.

Towards the end of the movie, Seinfeld meets Bill Cosby (which is pretty cool, since Cosby is one of Jerry’s idols), and Cosby points out to Jerry that he has already accomplished something great.

Then Cosby says:

“I think it’s one of the great moments of being a performer, when you can say, ‘you know, I took what I had, and I knocked it out of the park.’”

As soon as I heard that line, my ears perked up and I thought, “Wow! That sums it up perfectly.”

Cosby is talking about Seinfeld being one of the all time greats. He’s not talking about doing one show that wows that audience. He’s talking about creating a body of work that you can look back on and say, “I took what I had, and I knocked it out of the park.”

To me, that’s what it’s all about. Not money, or fame, or recognition (though those things are nice). It’s about knowing that you did the absolute best you could do.

In a nutshell, it’s about looking back and saying, “Yeah, I fulfilled my potential.”

This doesn’t apply just to performers. It applies to everyone, in all walks of life, personally and professionally.

Whatever you’re doing, whatever is important to you, you can take what you have and knock it out of the park. Be the best parent, accountant, artist, consultant, engineer, entrepreneur, whatever, that you can be.

I find that quite often, when I start talking about dreams and potential, people say, “but not everyone cares about being rich, or famous, or number one in the world.”

You’re right. Those things ma be other people’s dreams. The question is, what’s your dream? What’s your potential? What would constitute “knocking it out of the park” for you?

Here’s the rub though: don’t let yourself off the hook by saying, “take what I have? I don’t have much. I don’t have much potential.”

Bah – poppycock! You have tremendous potential. You just:

  1. Are afraid of admitting it because then you would have to do something about it.
  2. Haven’t put in the hard work of figuring out where your potential lies.
  3. Ignore it because life seems easier when you underachieve.
  4. Are letting your own drive be supplanted by what you think (or others think) you “should” be doing.
  5. Have conditioned yourself, through your own self-talk or through the words of others, to think small.

The first step is in accepting and understanding your potential. The second step is to go do something about it.

Now get out there, take what you have, and knock it out of the freakin’ park!”

***
Motivational Humorist Avish ParasharDo you want help knocking it out of the park? Then sign up for some Smart Ass Mentoring now!

Posted in Motivation & Success | 3 Comments

4 Ways You (and Your Team) Can Keep Kicking Ass, Even When Things Go Wrong

corkscrewIn Vino Veritas!

Translated: “Truth in Wine!”

Of course, in order for the Veritas to come out, you have to be able to get to the Vino…

I discovered this lesson a few years ago, when I decided it was time to throw a wine party. The plan was to invite a bunch of friends over and taste a wide variety of wines.

Pretentious? Absolutely. But keep in mind, I run a blog called the Motivational Smart Ass – how high class do you think any affair I throw would be?

I procured a wide assortment of wines, and my friends brought their own samplings as well. The party began, and we opened the first bottle (a very nice Gavi, if memory serves correctly). It was delicious. It was also a screw top, which was a good thing…

We moved on to wine number 2, which had a traditional cork. Fortunately, I had a corkscrew. Unfortunately, the corkscrew was not made of reinforced titanium steel.

Yes, you guessed it. I screwed the corkscrew into the wine, and as I was pulling it out – SNAP! The corkscrew broke in half.

I know what you’re thinking, because it’s the first thing I thought:

“Avish, surely you had another corkscrew somewhere?”

Shockingly, I did not. I have accumulated more junk than I know what to do with. I have a graveyard of kitchen accoutrements that I rarely, if ever use. This includes a salad spinner. Yes, I, who make my own salad with the same frequency that the housemates on the Jersey Shore stay in for the night curled up with a good book, own a salad spinner. My wine to salad consumption ratio is something like 1,825 to 1, yet at the time I had exactly one salad spinner and one corkscrew. Sadly, wine bottles can not be opened with salad spinners.

IMG – SALAD SPINNER

I know what you’re thinking now, because it’s what I thought of next:

“Avish, surely one of your friends would be the type that would carry around a pocket knife with a corkscrew on it, right?”

I know, you look at me and I look like the type of person who would have friends with bottle openers and corkscrews in their pockets, or purses, or on their key-chains. Maybe 10 years ago, but now everyone’s grown up and has kids, and responsibilities. Plus, for those who fly, the TSA has made it relatively impractical to keep a small stabbing device on your keychain. One day you’ll forget to take the corkscrew off your keychain before flying and BOOM! The next thing you know, you’re being fondled by one disgruntled employee while another rifles through the underwear in your carry-on bag… I would not recommend trying to take a corkscrew on a flight.

So I had no extra corkscrew, and neither did any of my guests.

I looked at the table where we had laid out all the wine and assessed the situation:

  • This is a wine party
  • We have only had one bottle of wine so far
  • My corkscrew is broken
  • About 80% of the remaining bottles have traditional corks in them.

This was a problem…

Wine, wine, everywhere, and not a drop to drink...

Wine, wine, everywhere, and not a drop to drink...

Being strong improvisers, we jumped into action. Of course, we didn’t jump into unified action. No, we somehow broke into three pairs, each with a different strategy for how to address the broken corkscrew situation (the others at the party just sat back and watched the mayhem ensue. The one person there who doesn’t drink and wasn’t going to have any wine was tickled pink at how desperate a group of adults can be when faced with a table full of wine and no corkscrew).

Before reading further, consider what your first solution would be here.

No, I mean it, really take a second and think about it, it will be important later.

Got it?

Ok, good. Now you can keep reading…

The Procurement Team

cash exchange hands

A friend and I both knew the best course of action: we needed to run out and buy a new corkscrew. There was CVS nearby which would surely have corkscrews. The thing was, it was almost eight o’clock, which I thought was near this store’s closing time. We quickly called and found out that:

  1. Yes, they do sell corkscrews and
  2. Yes, they were closing in five minutes.

There was no time to delay! The CVS was only a five minute walk away, but we couldn’t risk it. Instead, the two of us ran down to my car and drive to the CVS.

(I know what you’re thinking, but no, driving was fine. Remember, this was very early in the evening, after we had had only one glass of wine).

We got to the CVS right before it closed and my friend ran in and bought not one, but two corkscrews (smart – he bought a backup). We had our corkscrew. Crisis averted.

We returned home, only to discover that strange things had been afoot in our absence…

The Academic Team

The answer must be in here somewhere...

The answer must be in here somewhere...

While we were buying a replacement, two other people immediately hopped on-line and started researching “how to open wine without a corkscrew.” Amazingly, Google returns 231,000 results for that search.

Ah, Google, is there anything you can’t do?”

Well, there is one thing Google can’t do: come up with a sane way for people who have been drinking to open wine without a corkscrew.

Some of the idea you’ll find on Google include:

  1. Using a screw, screwdriver and hammer
  2. Wrapping the bottom of the bottle in a towel and whacking it against a flat surface, like a wall or phone book up against a tree!
  3. Digging a small knife into the cork and slowly working it out.

(You may be shocked to hear that there were no solutions involving the use of a salad spinner).

The problem with all of these suggestions is that they are wonderful ways of opening your first bottle of wine at someone else’s home. But tell me – would you want someone who had even had just a couple of glasses of wine to try any of these solutions in your house??

I am not sure which would be the worst option amongst the three. The hammer version would probably lead to household destruction. The whacking method would surely lead to a shattered bottle. And the knife method? I can only guess at the blood bath that would ensue when a 0.05 BAC, a paring knife, and a tough cork met for the first time.

Of course, this was the method my friends had settled on: using a knife to remove the cork.

You can almost hear the Looney Tunes music in the background…

Um, would you want this guy opening your wine..?

Um, would you want this guy opening your wine..?

Fortunately, I returned home with the new corkscrew before they had a chance to test the knife method. Crisis (and potential death) averted.

Of course, there was a reason they had not yet tried to open the wine with a knife. That’s because another solution had presented itself…

The Relationship Team

team fist pump

Two other people at the party offered up another innovative solution:

They went to the apartment next door and asked if they could borrow a corkscrew.

The guy said yes.

Crisis averted.

Color me stupid….

Ok, I’ll admit it, I was a little embarrassed when I discovered that they had come up with a simple solution that was free, took ten seconds to implement, and that I had completely overlooked.

Regardless of how silly I felt, the end result is that it ended up being a kick ass wine party. Now we had not one, not two, but three corkscrews to open wine with. Plus, we had two people who were 100% convinced they could open a bottle of wine with a paring knife (or phone book and tree…).

Looking back, the whole experience was somewhat enlightening. Here we had an unexpected problem and three completely different approaches to solving it. I think there is a lot to learn from this experience.

Here are four Veritas I learned about how to keep kicking ass even when things go wrong from my experience with the Vino:

Pausing and Thinking is a Good Idea

Meditation is optional, but a little thought can go a very long way

Meditation is optional, but a little thought can go a very long way

I’m all for action. Nothing gets done until someone takes some action. When Ding Happens, you’ll often get an immediate idea for a solution. However, just because that was the first thing you thought of, that doesn’t mean that’s your best or smartest solution.

It’s usually a good idea to pause, take a step back and breathe, and then think through your options. You may end up going with your first thought, but many times you’ll be able to come up with a simpler, better, and faster solution.

A few moments of thought before running out the door to the CVS and we wouldn’t have needed to waste a trip.

Question: When Ding Happens, do you jump into the first action that comes to mind or do you take a moment to think through your options?

There is Power in Teamwork

What's gonna work? Teeeeeeeaaaaaaammmmmmwork...

What's gonna work? Teeeeeeeaaaaaaammmmmmwork...

For those of you who think you can do it all on your own, remember, in this story, we had three different pairs of people who all came up with three different solutions.

If it had been me alone, I would have stuck to my, “buying a new corkscrew’ strategy and missed the other options.

This is one of the reasons why teams are useful: they allow you to have a group of people who will see things the others miss. They bring different backgrounds, perspectives, and approaches to solving problems. Don’t discount them just because they have different ideas from you.

Never underestimate the power of someone else’s perspective. Even if you think you have all the answers, it’s worth getting a little help from your friends…

Question: Open and willing are you to listen to other people’s advice and get their perspective?

There is Power in a Team of Individuals

Sometimes working alone first can lead to the best team solutions

Sometimes working alone first can lead to the best team solutions

I read a book (I believe it was The Invisible Gorilla) that stated that the best way to get ideas and solutions from a group of people was to have each person come up with ideas on their own, and then share them.

This allows each individual to tap into their creativity without being biased or bullied by other people’s opinion. In many group situations, individuals may just go along with the “leader” or strongest opinion rather than speak up or think of their own ideas. By allowing people to create on their own first, you eliminate this dynamic.

This is what happened with our wine situation. Without doing it intentionally, we broke into three groups who worked on the problem separately and came up with their own ideas. Each idea was different and still valid (yes, even the knife one).

If everyone had just listened to me (since it was my party) when I said, “Ok, we’re going to buy a new corkscrew,” we never would have had the other ideas. In this case, it didn’t make much difference since the first solution worked.

Questions: How many good ideas might you be letting pass you by because you are forcing people to collaborate in a way that stifles their creativity?

Try this as an experiment: The next time you are going to brainstorm a solution with a group, start by having each person come up with some ideas on their own. Use those ideas as a starting point for your group collaboration.

Understand Your Bias

Doing things your way is fine. Until it isn't.

Doing things your way is fine. Until it isn't.

Chances are that you have a solution bias. When things go wrong, you probably have a preferred strategy you use to solve the problem.

In this story, we saw three different strategies:

  • The Money Strategy – What can I spend money on to solve this problem?
  • The Learner Strategy – What do I need to learn to solve this problem?
  • The Relationship Strategy – Who can I ask for help to solve this problem?

There are other strategies as well. Here are a few:

  • The Flowing Strategy – How can I change course to make this problem irrelevant?
  • The One Step at a Time Strategy – What little piece of this problem can I solve right now?
  • The Meditation Strategy – Where can I go to think and reflect on the problem?
  • The Action Strategy – What can I do right now that’s at least somewhat related?
  • The Anger Strategy – Who can I yell at to solve this problem?
  • The Ostrich Strategy – How can I ignore this problem until it goes away?
  • The Happy Hour Strategy – Where can I get a drink to forget about this problem?
  • The Buck Passing Strategy – Who can I hand this problem off to?
  • The Woe is Me Strategy – Who can I complain to (and how loudly) to make me feel better about this problem?
  • The Quitting Strategy – How can I just give up?

(Please add your ideas for additional strategies in the comments section below!)

As you can see, there are some good strategies and some not so good ones.

Chances are that one, or maybe two, of these are your default strategy. When something goes wrong, your first instinct is always the same. There’s nothing wrong with that, but it may be limiting.

There is no best strategy. Some are clearly destructive, but many are valid. Some are better in some situations than others. Your default may not always be the best course of action.

Once you understand:

  1. What your default strategy is.
  2. What some of the other approaches are…

..You will be able to catch yourself when you get into “tunnel vision” style thinking and then step back and see if there is a better way.

Question: What is your default strategy when Ding Happens? Are there other strategies you need to remember to consider that may be more effective in some situations?

You may never find yourself hosting a wine party with a broken corkscrew. I certainly hope you don’t. But sadly, you will surely find yourself facing unexpected challenges and problems from time to time. Take a moment now to reflect on how you currently handle them so that you may be better able to handle challenges in the future.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m in the mood for a glass of wine, and I need to find a phone book and tree to get the bottle open…

***
Motivational Humorist Avish ParasharYou do realize that this topic (how to stay on track when things go wrong) is the premise of Avish’s speaking presentations and training workshops, right? If you and/or your team, department, or organization could use more awesome advice about kicking ass even when things go wrong, then you need to check out Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!

Posted in Ding!, Improv Comedy, Motivation & Success | 4 Comments

Do as I Say, AND as I Do

shush booksEver hear the expression, “do as I say, not as I do?”

Well, as in most cases, that’s a pretty stupid way to go. Let’s look at an example…

I went to my local library the other day (which I love) hoping to find some material to broaden my mind – or at least a good novel to get lost in. As I perused the new releases, I noticed an interesting thing: it was quite loud.

I had always assumed the library was supposed to be quiet, like a morgue, or an audience at a John Cage Concert. This day the library sounded more like a coffee shop or small cocktail party. I could hear at least three distinct conversations echoing through the large room.

I was confused. Why hadn’t the staff quieted these warblers? I looked up to see who these vociferous windbags were…

Yup, you guessed it: Library staff members were involved in all three of the conversations!

*Sigh*

Two of the conversations were between staff and customers (is “customer” the right word when it comes to people who use a library? What’s a better word? Patron? Client? Frugal reader?). The other was between two staff members behind the counter.

What the heck?!? Is it just me? Does no one else believe that:

  1. Libraries should be quiet? And …
  2. Employees should follow the rules they set for others?

Maybe I’m wrong, and libraries are no longer a place of relative silence. But if I’m not (and I don’t think I am), shouldn’t the people who work there be setting an example, not violating the rule?

Sadly, you see this kind of hypocrisy all the time:

  • Rules and admonishments that the environment should be quiet, but the employees are the ones making the noise.
  • A posted sign says, “No food or drink,” but the owner often eats openly in front of everyone.
  • Offices that penalize you for being late but are always running behind schedule.
  • A company with a strict “no personal calls” policy – except, of course, when the boss needs to make one
  • And on and on

If you’re the one in charge, be it as an owner, manager, or employee, it’s easy to look at the rules and say, “eh, these don’t apply to me.” But if you want happy customers, content employees, and a growing business, you should rethink that mindset.

(For the employees, you might be saying, “why should they care, they’re not in charge?” To which I respond, “Yes, and with that kind of attitude they never will be.”)

If you are a leader, or aspire to be one someday, set an example, lead from the front, and stop being a hypocrite. Your customers, workers, and bottom line will thank you.

Motivational Humorist Avish ParasharAre you planning an event and looking for a great speaker to add humor and energy? Then visit Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!

Posted in Business Advice | 2 Comments

Preparing for the New Year

crystal ball(Note: This post was supposed to go out a few weeks ago, but as I mentioned in my New Years Lapse post, things got a little off-track. But, since the ideas don’t apply just to the new year, and since some people may not have done any New Years planning, or perhaps their plans have already gone off track, I am posting this anyway)

This time of year is a motivational speaker’s dream. It’s the time when people look to the next year and start setting goals, dreaming big, and making resolutions, This is the kind of stuff we like to help people with all year round!

I am a big fan of thinking and dreaming big. I wrote this post to help you  prepare for this year in a way that maximizes your chances of making 2011 the best year ever!

What Worked Well For You?

poker royal flush

Before you get all excited about what you want to do this year, I would advise you to first look back over last year and take stock of where you are, where you want to go, and what did and did not work for you. By understanding where you are, you will be better prepared to make plans to figure out where to go.

One of the best the things you can do for yourself is to:

  1. Figure out what works for you and then…
  2. Leverage the hell out of it

I am continuously astounded by how many people (myself included, sadly) fight their own nature and try to conform to the way other people do things.

You read a book (or a blog post, hehehe) by some “guru” and then you go off and try to cram your work style into their method. That can work, if you happen to come across an expert who’s style happens to match your own.  In many cases, however, you just end up making yourself miserable and then feel depressed because you didn’t get the results you thought you would.

Instead, right now, before you start planning out next year, take a look back at what worked well for you this past year. Put another way, when did you work well?

Consider your work style:

  1. When are you most productive? Morning, night, lunchtime, etc?
  2. Where are you most productive? At home? In the office? At a coffee shop?
  3. What conditions do you need in your environment to be productive? Total silence? Music? Madcap activity? Working alone? Working with other people?

Consider the types of projects:

  1. What were you excited to work on this past year?
  2. What depressed the hell out of you when you had to do it?

What were your highs and lows?

  1. Without too much thought, what moments jump out at you as the best from the past year
  2. Which moments jump out at you as the worst?

Once you have these lists, start looking for patterns. Look for things you can build off of and repeat to help keep you on track.

When I did this for myself, I realized some very useful things when it came to my work habits. Those insights helped me immensely in making my 2011 plan.

What Needs Improvement?

broken chain

Don’t beat yourself up over this one, but face it: we all have areas where we could do better. What are the areas in your life where you think, “I need to do better at this?”

Try to come up with a specific, actionable item. For example, rather than, “I need to be more productive,” try, “I need to stop surfing the internet first thing in the morning.” As opposed to “I need to be healthier,” use, “I need to walk 30 minutes a day, five times a week.”

Broad generalities get ignored. It’s much easier to take action and improve when you can break your limitations down to single steps.

Where Are You Now?

You gotta know where you are before you can go anywhere else

You gotta know where you are before you can go anywhere else

For the next few minutes, completely let go of the past and future, and focus entirely on the present moment. You may find it helpful to close your eyes and just take a few deep breaths.

Once you are entirely focused on the here and now, take an honest appraisal of where you are now. Consider many different areas of your life:

  • Physical:
  • Financial
  • Career
  • Passion
  • Relationships
  • Fun
  • Etc.

The key here is to keep yourself in control and let emotions go. In some areas, you may get mad at yourself (“I can’t believe I let myself get this out of shape!’), or start lamenting the past (“if only I hadn’t left my job to start this failing business!”). Don’t do that now. When self-judging thoughts come up, let them go and refocus on the present.

What we’re going for here is an objective summary of your current situation. Don’t just focus on the negative either! Be completely honest with the good and bad.

Some people will find this much harder than others. If you do, that’s ok. But stick with it. It’s a lot easier to get to where you want if you know where you are starting from.

Where Do You Want to Go?

Close your eyes and think about where you'd like your life to go

Close your eyes and think about where you'd like your life to go

Now that you have taken stock of your current situation, it’s time to decide where you want to go.

It’s hard to get somewhere if you don’t know where you want to go. So let me ask you: what do you want to achieve in 2011?

Type “goal setting” into Google and you get well over three million results, so I am not going to talk too much about it here. I’ll just give a few tips to help you do this:

  1. In step 1, go crazy. Brainstorm a list of everything you would like to achieve in 2011. Don’t worry about realism or possibility. Have fun.
  2. In step 2, go through your list and pick out those that are truly important to you. Pick the ones that a) you really want and b) would really have a positive impact on your life
  3. In step 3, narrow your list down to at most three.
  4. In step 4, adjust the size and scope of your goal so the goal is not too big or too small (read my “Goldilocks Test for Effective Goal Setting” post for more info on this)

At this point, you should have a list of at most three goals. (If you want more than three, put them on a separate list and save those to be tackled once you have finished your first three). The goals should be things you truly want that will have a positive impact on your life. And they should be a good size for you to take on without feeling overwhelmed.

Your final step is to create a plan to achieve those goals. Combine the insights you gained about what works for you and what doesn’t, with your three goals and create a plan that leverages your strengths, minimizes your weaknesses, and sets you up to get to where you want with minimal resistance.

How exactly do you go about creating your plan? Rather than going into in depth here, let me refer you to my recent “Resolution #1: No More Resolutions!” post

Create a list of six habits that will allow you to reach your 2011 goals, and then commit to installing those habits, one at a time, for two months each.

If you do this, not only should you achieve your goals, but you will also have developed a series of habits that will serve you and help you be successful long after this year is over. That will make it much easier in twelve months to make 2012 your best year ever!

***
Motivational Humorist Avish ParasharDo you want help making 2011 awesome? Then sign up for some Smart Ass Mentoring now!
 

Posted in Motivation & Success | Tagged | 13 Comments

The Holiday Hangover Cure – Add Some Excitement to Your Life!

hangoverWhen was the last time you woke up really, really excited about getting up and going to work? If your answer is “a long time ago,” or, “I can’t ever remember waking up really, really excited to go to work,” then keep reading…

I’ll admit it, On Saturday, January 1st, I felt a twinge of sadness. I had a holiday hangover. (No, this had nothing to do with the party the night before).

Why? Because the holidays were over, and in two days it was “back to work.” After a week off, and a month of anticipation, preparation, parties, gift giving, and general mirth, it was back to the grind, as they say.

I was very sad to leave behind the relaxation and fun of the previous two weeks.

For example, over the holiday, I did something I had not done in a few years: I let myself get immersed in a computer game (Half-Life 2, if you’re curious. Yes, I’m a nerd). I played that game every day for a week until it was done. It was awesome!

There were times during that week where I would go to bed excited about waking up the next morning to play Half Life. I would wake up in the morning, lie in bed for a few minutes, then think to myself, “Oooh, if I get out of bed now I can play an extra 30 minutes of Half-Life!”

Half Life 2 - check it out

Half Life 2 - check it out

That feeling really struck a chord in me, because I honestly couldn’t tell you the last time I went to bed excited about waking up the next morning to “go to work.” I couldn’t tell you a time I woke up in the morning and thought, “Oooh, if I get out of bed now, I can get 30 extra minutes of work done! Whoo-hoo!”

This was a scary revelation for me. What if it turns out that I wasn’t excited by my business? What if I was doing the wrong thing? What if, what if, what if…

I have invested a lot of time, energy, and money – in short, a lot of my life – in this endeavor. It would be one hell of a wake up call to realize that, “oh, you’re doing the wrong thing!”

However, just because the truth may hurt doesn’t mean that we should avoid it. I didn’t want to be a person that “merely existed” for most days of the year, and only “came alive” during vacations, holidays, and the occasional fun weekend.

So I thought…

I analyzed…

I researched…

I wrote…

And eventually, I figured some things out.

It turns out I do love what I do.  I think I am incredibly lucky to be able to do it. And I do have days where I am excited about work – specifically the nights before and mornings of my speaking gigs.

But on most “office days,” when I am working from the home office writing and doing business development, the feeling was more, “back to the grind,” than, “YIPPEE!”

I'll admit it - this was <b>not</b> me...

I'll admit it - this was not me...

This obviously wasn’t an “optimal situation.” I was running my own business. I was my own boss. How on earth could I be in a situation where I didn’t enjoy what I did?? Could I “blame the boss”? Hang around the water cooler (I would first have to buy a water cooler) and complain about how “the old man is really riding my ass today”? Would I then have to reprimand myself? Give myself a bad evaluation?? Eventually let myself go???

I didn’t have to do anything so drastic. I realized I just needed tom make some changes, to reignite that “fire in the belly” when it came to my own work. Along the way I learned some things that may be helpful to you.

This isn’t just about finding a “good job” that you like; it’s about making the most of your life. Years ago, I had a very nice corporate job I liked very much. But rare was the day that I would wake up and say, “Yes! I get to go write Visual Basic computer code today!” (Ok, I’ll admit, there were a couple of days where I said that. But only a couple. I told you I was a nerd…)

It’s easy to know it’s time for a change when you hate what you do. It’s much harder to figure out if you’re whiling time away, settling for far less than you deserve.

If you are not, at least on a semi-regular basis, waking up excited about going to (or “doing your”) work, let me suggest six strategies:

1) Revisit What You Do and Why You Do It

Why are you doing what you're doing?

Why are you doing what you're doing?

It’s easy to fall into a routine and take things for granted. You may not need a major change in your work; maybe you just need to reconnect with what you do, and remind yourself why you do it.

This is what worked for me. After my “I’m obsessed with Half-Life 2” revelation and ensuing analysis, I am happy to say that I realized, “no, I don’t need to make a big change. I just need to get back in touch with what I love about my work and why I love doing it.”

In short, I had let my work become my “job.” It was just something I did.

Taking a little time to reflect on why I loved what I loved made a huge difference for me. The focus shifted off of “what I had to do” to “the reason I do it.”

The reasons for me were altruistic (I get to help people), financial (I get to make money that lets me do things and buy stuff I want), selfish (this work gives me tremendous freedom, control, and flexibility) and personal (there is nothing I like as much as being creative, and speaking and writing let me do that).

If you’ve been waking up with the “blahs” and feeling uninspired, maybe you just need to remind yourself why you are a lucky S.O.B. because you get to do what you do.

2) Eliminate the Crap

How much can you delete? Maybe more than you think...

How much can you delete? Maybe more than you think...

Every job, every career, every business, every endeavor, has some level of crap associated with it. It’s not all going to be ponies and rainbows (or beer and wings, or whatever metaphor you’d like to use for “fun and games.” I suppose you could just go with “fun and games.” Whatever floats your boat.)

Sometimes though, the reason you are not feeling excited is that you are too overloaded with crap. The crap parts of your work can overshadow the good fun stuff.

The solution? Eliminate the crap.

Of course you can’t eliminate all of it, but you can probably get rid of a lot of it, using the Four D approach organizers and productivity experts recommend:

  1. Delete – Can you just not deal with it? Your initial impulse may be to say no, but you’d be surprised how many things you can safely eliminate.
  2. Delegate – Can someone else do it? Whether it’s someone on your staff, someone you hire, a volunteer, a “forced volunteer,” or someone you trade tasks with,  see if you can find someone to take some of the crap off your plate.
  3. Do – Just do it. Yes, it’s crap. But the longer you wait to get to it, the more it will weigh on your mind. Get it out of the way and move on to the fun stuff.
  4. Defer – Put it off. Be careful with this one! As mentioned above, putting something off doesn’t remove it from your mind. It can still depress you. If you do defer things, put them off for a specific reason and until a specific time.

Get rid of as much crap as you can, and you’ll open up space for more and more excitement.

3) Prioritize by Excitement

Kids prioritize by what excites them - maybe you could use some of that in your life

Kids prioritize by what excites them - maybe you could use some of that in your life

This goes hand in hand with “eliminating the crap.”

You probably have a lot of items you could be working on, and a lot of items you should be working on. How do you decide which one to do first?

Try this approach: pick the one you are most excited about. It may not be the biggest or most critical, but if you make that one your top priority it will get you energized, and that will spill over into the rest of your tasks.

For example, “writing fiction” is one of my top priorities for this year. Every day, that is the first thing I do. Fiction writing has nothing to do with my business and won’t make me any money (not any time soon, certainly), but I want to do it, and I am excited about it. The second thing I do is writing material for this blog and a new book, and that also excites me (and is relevant to my business).

Interesting note: Often, the items that excite you the most won’t be the most important. If you don’t make them a priority, you’ll never get around to them. In short, you’ll be putting off your fun forever…

4) Change Your Language

The words you use can have great impact

The words you use can have great impact

This is a technique I came across many years ago, but was never able to make work for myself until recently.

In short, this involves using different words than you normally use to describe your situation.

I would suggest one simple change:

Stop saying, “I have to…” and switch to “I get to…

  • “I have to go to work,” becomes, “I get to go to work.”
  • “I have to work on my side business,” becomes, “I get to work on my side business.”
  • “I have to attend this meeting,” becomes, “I get to attend this meeting.”
  • “I have to go to the gym,” becomes, “I get to go to the gym.”
  • And so on, and so on…

(Note: I usually see this technique taught as “replace ‘have to’ which ‘choose to.’” Using “choose to” never resonated with me the way, “get to” does. Try both (or a different, better one) and see which works for you)

To be honest with you, I was skeptical that this would have any impact for me, but it has made a huge difference. It will probably seem a little goofy and fake at first.

Saying, “I get to attend this meeting”?? But I hate these boring meetings!

I know. But you still get to attend them. In the U.S., the unemployment rate is something like 9%. There are people everywhere who are impoverished who would just love to get to go to your meeting, if it meant having your job (and income).

For just about everything you hate that you feel you have to do, there is some person out there who would kill for the chance to get to do it.

Life may not be perfect, but it could be a hell of a lot worse. When you say, “I get to,” especially with things that you don’t like, it forces your mind to remind yourself how lucky you are to be where you are right now.

Don’t knock it ‘til you try it. It made a big difference for me.

5) Make a Big Change

I'm just sayin'...

I'm just sayin'...

I had a job about 12 years ago that I hated. I loathed it. I detested it. I would not only wake up depressed about having to go, I would go to sleep depressed about it. In fact, I hit a point where I would wake up Saturday morning depressed that I had to go back to work Monday morning.

This, my friends, was a telltale sign that I needed a wholesale change.

Sure, I could use some of the techniques in this article, along with other strategies involving “positive thinking” and “reframing,” etc. But at the end of the day, I needed to completely change jobs.

I originally took the job because it paid more than double what my previous job paid (where I was woefully underpaid). But I soon discovered that it was not a good fit at all. I tried for about four months before I started looking for another job, and it took me about five months to find one. Ten months after I started, I left. To this day, I am still happy about that decision and still thankful I will never have to go back to that job.

Sometimes your best strategy will be to change your job, or even your industry. This could be because:

  • You hate what you do
  • You are bored and not going anywhere
  • You honestly realized there is something else you would rather do

This is not a decision to enter into lightly. However, don’t run away from making this decision simply because it is a big one. .I know people who have done that, and they have universally been miserable with their lives.

6) Add Something Else that Energizes You

Find something you love. Even it's something crazy, like using a chainsaw to carve ice sculptures of Half Life 2 characters. If that's your thing, go for it.

Find something you love. Even it's something crazy, like using a chainsaw to carve ice sculptures of Half Life 2 characters. If that's your thing, go for it.

This method is my least favorite, but it is the easiest approach, and probably the most common one.

If you are in a job that you like, but that doesn’t energize you, then at least consider adding something else into you life that does.

This could be a hobby. It could be your family. It could be a side business.

So you may not wake up excited to go to work, but you can focus on how excited you are to come home from work and tackle that fun project you have. And you may appreciate the fact that your job gives you the income and stability to enjoy and explore your passion.

Having an outside passion can make your work more exciting too. Have you ever planned a big, fun vacation? You now how that whole week before you go into work with a bounce in your step as you anticipate the trip? Imagine being able to feel that way year round.

I still think that life is too short to spend 40+ hours a week on something that doesn’t particularly excite you, but this is a good short term solution. Or, if for whatever reason you truly feel you can’t apply one of the other three strategies, this may be the way to go.

Going into this year, I applied strategies 1, 3, and 4. It’s only been about two weeks, but so far, my excitement level has been high. Much higher than it’s been in a while. As a result, my productivity and fun have both been higher too.

If you accomplish nothing else this year but find a reason to excitedly wake up in the morning, you will be well on your way to making 2011 the best year ever!

***
Motivational Humorist Avish ParasharDo you want help making 2011 your best year ever? Then sign up for some Smart Ass Mentoring now!

Posted in Motivation & Success | 2 Comments

The “Goldilocks Test” for Effective Goal Setting

bear in suitWhat can you learn about goal setting from a juvenile delinquent who commits breaking and entering, vandalism, and theft? Quite a bit, actually.

The felon in question is of course, Goldilocks, of “Goldilocks and the Three Bears” fame.

For those of you unfamiliar with the story, here’s a recap:

Once upon a time, three bears, Father, Mother, and Baby, lived in a house in the woods. One day they cooked up some porridge and decided to take a walk while it cooled down. While they were on their walk, a girl, Goldilocks, comes across the house. Seeing that the house is empty, she lets herself in.

At this point, I have two questions:

  1. Who, when they come across an empty house, just decides that it’s ok to let yourself in? Who raised this child, Hudson Hawk?
  2. Do bears not lock their doors? Has years of cave dwelling made them incapable of properly using doors? Or was Goldilocks an expert lock picker? I suppose, since the house was in the middle of the woods and this was something like 1837, locking seemed to be unnecessary. These days though, if you come home to find a little girl has invaded your home because you didn’t lock up, well, don’t come crying to me…
Adorable? Absolutely. but still a felon

Adorable? Absolutely. But still a felon

Once inside, Goldilocks sees the porridge and thinks, “hey, why not? Let me eat some of this porridge that I have no right to.” This must have been in the days before peanut and gluten allergies. Otherwise, there is no way she eats something without knowing every last ingredient in it. Though I think it would be an interesting twist and a nice comeuppance if she took a big bite of porridge and suddenly went into anaphylactic shock. Maybe I’ll write that story: “Goldilocks and the Three EpiPens.”

She digs in, but the first porridge is too hot. The second porridge is too cold. But the third one (the baby’s) is just right, so she eats it all (Stealing candy from a baby, if you will…).

She then decides to sit for a spell, and finds three chairs. The first is too big. The second is too big too. The third is just right. She cops a squat in the chair, and of course, since she is a gluttonous child who can not refrain from eating other people’s porridge, the chair breaks under her weight (Let’s add “vandalism” to her list of charges).

At this point, after having trespassed, stolen food, and damaged property, you would think the girl would leave. But oh no, she’s not done yet!

Instead, she goes upstairs and finds three beds. I am not a professional house burglar, but I would wager that nowhere in the “Little Girl’s Guide to Home Invasion”  does it say, “if, while you are breaking into a house, you come across a bed and are feeling a bit drowsy, consider taking a short nap.” But that is in fact what she does.

She tries the first bed, and it is too hard. The second bed is too soft. But the third? The third is just right…

This just doesn't seem like a smart thing to do at this moment...

This just doesn't seem like a smart thing to do at this moment...

After she falls asleep, the three bears come home to discover their house has been broken into.

They first see the porridge:

“Someone’s been eating my porridge,” said Father Bear (Side Note: Isn’t it interesting that the bears immediately jump to “someone.” And not “something” or “some animal.” Having seen Bambi, they know that humans are the enemies of animals everywhere).

“Someone’s been eating my porridge,” said Mother Bear.

“Someone’s been eating my porridge, and they ate it all up!” said Baby Bear.

Next, they see the chairs:

“Someone‘s been sitting in my chair,” said Father Bear.

“Someone‘s been sitting in my chair,” said Mother Bear.

“Someone‘s been sitting in my chair, and they broke it to pieces!” said Baby Bear.

Ok, let’s add “Traumatizing bear cub” to the list of Goldilocks’ misdeeds. Could you imagine if, when you were a young child, you found out that not only had someone broken into your home, eaten your food, and broken your chair, but that they had essentially left the rest of your family’s things untouched? How could you NOT think that you were being targeted? For all you know, some crazy, Ursinophiliac Hannibal Lector might be stalking you. I don’t know if baby bear would ever sleep soundly again…

Poor, sad bear

Poor, sad bear

The bears then move to the bedroom, and the pattern repeats itself.

“Someone’s been sleeping in my bed,” said Father Bear.

“Someone’s been sleeping in my bed,” said Mother Bear.

(Ok, here’s strike one for the bears. I’m not a parent, but I would think that if I discovered that some freak had been targeting my child, my primary concern would be for my child. I wouldn’t walk into the bedroom and look at my bed first. I would go straight to my kid’s bed. With a baseball bat. And a vial of acid. I’m just saying…)

“Someone’s been sleeping in my bed, and she’s still in it!” said Baby Bear.

This would be trauma inducing incident part #2. If, as a young child, you came home and found a stranger sleeping in your bed, would you ever – and I mean EVER – be able to walk into your bedroom alone for bed time again? I think not…

I suppose if your Goldliocks looked like this, it might not be so bad. But in any other case: Trauma!

I suppose if your Goldilocks looked like this, it might not be so bad. But in any other case: Trauma!

This commotion wakes Goldilocks up, who, upon seeing three perturbed bears around her bed, jumps up and runs out of the house. The bears then…well, frankly, I don’t know what the bears do at this point. The story doesn’t really say. I can only assume that they filed a police report and went out and bought an ADT security system. Perhaps they organized a neighborhood watch with the Three Little Pigs and Little Red Riding Hood. At the very least, they should have sent Baby Bear to a child psychologist.

One has to wonder how exactly Goldilocks got away from not one, not two, but three bears. Looks like years of eating porridge and living in a nice house with comfy beds and chairs had made the bears soft and slow. Lucky for Goldilocks…

So that’s the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears.

What’s the Point?

I relate this story to you not to talk about the ridiculousness of children’s stories (as I have done in the past) or to talk about the stupidity of trespassing (if I have to explain that to you, I don’t think I want you reading my blog).

No I tell this to you because, if we ignore her crimes, we can use Goldilocks’ hunt for the perfect porridge, chair, and bed to help us plan our goals and activities.

When making plans and setting goals, we often look immediately at the tactics of achieving those goals and carrying out those plans. We would be better served to take some time to first examine the goal and make sure it is the right size.

Just like Goldilocks kept moving from item to item until she found one that was “just right,” so too should you try to set goals (activity or result) that are “just right.” Not too big, not too small.

If the goal is too big, it can be overwhelming. You may start out strong with initial momentum, but get easily discouraged when you look at just how large a task you have laid out for yourself.

If the goal is too small, you may find yourself unmotivated to take any action at all.

For example, let’s say that you currently earn $5,000 per month and you want to make more money. If you set a goal of earning $10,000 per month, your mind may shut down. Doubling your income seems like too large a task.

Going the other direction, let’s say you set the goal of a 1% increase; earning an additional $50 per month. That may seem very possible, but how motivated are you going to be to work longer and harder or change any existing behavior for something so small?

The key, in this case, is to find the “just right” number. Maybe it’s $500 more. Maybe $2,000. Maybe, for you, doubling your income isn’t daunting. Or, maybe for you increasing by 1% is a huge task.

There is no right or wrong answer. Every person and every situation is different.

Use Your Intuition

The best way to figure out if you have a “just right” goal is to think about it and then see how you feel. Imagine that you were going to start working on this goal right now (or first thing tomorrow morning) and ask yourself:

  • Do I feel bored, excited, or scared?
  • Do I feel achieving this goal is a no-brainer, a bit of a stretch, or kind of impossible?
  • Do I feel apathetic, motivated, or overwhelmed?

If you feel bored, apathetic, and unchallenged, then the goal is too small. Scared, overwhelmed, and like you’re facing an insurmountable obstacle, and it is too big. Excited, motivated, and like you’ll have to stretch just a bit, and the goal is “just right.”

The nice thing is that it’s easy to turn too big or too small goals into “just right” ones:

  • If the goal is too big, simply break it down into smaller sub-goals and focus on those.
  • If the goal is too small, ask yourself, “Why do I want to achieve this?” The answer will be part of a bigger goal, which may be your “just right” one.

As 2011 gets under way, take a look at the goals, resolutions, or, ideally, habits you have planned for yourself for this year. Apply the Goldilocks test to all of them, and before you run off and start taking action, make sure they are all “just right.”

And whatever you do, if you find a cabin in the woods that has pictures of a bear family on the mantle, don’t break in and start vandalizing the place – it won’t end happily ever after…

P.S. For a darker version of Goldilocks, check out this brief Simpsons’ clip, where Bart leaves the house first and bars the door with a chair…

***
Motivational Humorist Avish ParasharAre you planning an event and looking for a great speaker to add humor and energy? Then visit Avish’s Motivational Humorist page now!
 

Posted in Business Advice, Motivation & Success | Tagged | 2 Comments

Resolution #1: No More Resolutions!

januaryIt’s January 3rd, do you know where your resolutions are…?

If you’re like most of the world, you either:

  1. Didn’t make any.
  2. Have already broken them.
  3. Will break them soon.

Why not try a different approach this year? Why not try building habits instead of making resolutions?

I started writing a blog post on this topic, but then, while researching the article, I came across an awesome post from Leo Babauta at ZenHabits.net which explains it quite well.

Rather than reinventing the wheel, I figure, hey, why not just link to it? (my comments below):

The Definitive Guide to Sticking to Your New Year’s Resolutions

This is absolutely the method I plan to employ for 2011.

Habit Building is the Key

If you make a resolution or set a goal, you may very well achieve what you set out to achieve. However, if you haven’t built a habit, then as soon as you achieve your goal you will go right back to where you started (if you’ve ever lost weight on a diet only to gain it back, you know what I’m talking about).

I learned this lesson from my study of improv comedy. Great improvisers aren’t the ones who just learn all the skills; they are the people who learn the skills so well that they become automatic. When they are able to do that, not only do they get better at improv, but improv comedy actually becomes easy.

In the same way, if you build habits instead of chasing goals, not only will you be more successful, but your success will come much easier.

Seems like a no brainer to me…

How Do I Pick a Habit?

Two suggestions:

1) Start with a goal

Yes, I know I said habits are better than goals, but that doesn’t mean that goals are bad. It just means that after you set your goal, don’t just stop. Rather, ask yourself, “what habit will help me not only achieve that goal now, but also will help me continue to generate great results in the future?” Then work on building those habits. The goals will happen naturally.

2) Pick a habit you know you need

You may not have a big goal, but just know there is a new habit you need to develop, like waking up earlier, flossing your teeth, or exercising regularly. Go ahead and stat with that one.

Frankly, I like method 1 because it gives motivation. If you know why you are building the habit, you will have an easier time maintaining the self-discipline to stick with it.

If you naturally find yourself using method #2, just ask yourself, “Why do I want to build this habit?” You’ll either get to a deeper meaning, or realize that you don’t really care about the habit.

My Habits

I have my six habits ready to go. Since Leo says to make them public, and since it may be beneficial to you to see what I am up to, here they are:

  1. Maximize My AM Productivity – Write 1,000 words of fiction, 2,000 words of non-fiction, and do 3 high value marketing activities everday before checking email or visiting any of my standard “procrastinating” websites (sadly, this has historically been a big problem for me…).
  2. Develop the Habit of Mindful Eating – Be consciously aware of my body, my hunger, and every bite of food I put in my mouth
  3. Maximize My Afternoon Productivity – Everyday after lunch, pick one high value project and attack it with the “50-50-30” plan. (50 minutes on, 10 minutes off. 50 minutes on, 10 minutes off. 30 minutes on. During “on times” focus exclusively on that one thing and shut everything else off)
  4. Exercise – Develop the habit of getting some kind of exercise everyday.
  5. Education – Spend one hour a day, usually in the evening, engaged in learning. This could be reading a non-fiction book, listening to an audio program, or watching tutorial videos (I have a backlog of many of all of these)
  6. Fun – Spend one hour a day engaging in something that is actively fun (as opposed to mindlessly surfing the internet or watching TV). This could be reading a good fiction book, spending time with friends, playing a video game that I am into. Whatever, as long as I think it’s fun.

There you have it. Those are my six goals. Looking at it here, it seems like a lot, but each one is broken up into gradually increasing chunks. For example, for week one of habit one, I am just committing to 125 words of fiction, 250 words of non-fiction, and 1 marketing activity a day. That is so small that I know beyond a doubt I can do it. (Of course, after I have completed the habit portion, I may revisit all those activities later in the day and do more).

If you have struggled in the past with resolutions and goals, why not give the 6 habit plan a try? If you’re feeling particularly bold, go ahead and post your six in the comments below.

Best of luck, and here’s to an amazing 2011!
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Motivational Humorist Avish Parashar Want help creating your habits and making 2011 absolutely rock? Then sign up for some Smart Ass Mentoring now!
 

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