The World Wants You to Be Stupid: Nutella

Posted on January 21, 2010 by Avish

nutellaNote: This is part of a regular series dedicated to pointing out instances where the world is relying on you being stupid – don’t fall for it!

In this edition of TWWYTBS, we look at another ad for an unhealthy product passing itself off as some kind of health food. Yes, I realize that the last TWWYTBS about Taco Bell’s Drive Thru Diet had a similar theme, but I just saw this and had to share.

There is an ad on TV for Nutella, a delicious chocolate hazelnut spread. It is quite good, but it is basically chocolate. Evidently, the folks at Nutella think this qualifies it as health food, and they want mom’s to include Nutella as part of their kids’ health plan.

You can see the ad I first saw on TV at Nutella’s US website.

Here’s a version I found on YouTube that is very similar:

So Nutella is positioning itself as a health food now…?

What.

The.

Heck?!

Don’t get me wrong, I have recently fallen in love with Nutella. It is, after all, delicious. If I need a snack, half of a a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich (with or without sliced bananas) hits the spot. But I am under no illusions that the Nutella itself is healthy.

The ad, however, would have you believe otherwise. Let’s take a look at some of the brilliant text:

“I feel good starting my kids day with Nutella, as part of a nutritious breakfast.”

The words, “as part of a healthy breakfast” should be permanently banned from all advertising. I watched a lot of Saturday morning cartoons growing up, so I saw a lot of cereal commercials. They could advertise the most sugar laden cereal in the world, then say, “as part of a nutritious (or healthy, or balanced) breakfast,” then show a picture of the bowl of cereal with a glass of OJ, some toast, and fruit. Well sure, if the rest of the breakfast is healthy you can tack on whatever else you want. This line could read, “I feel good starting my kids day off with a shot of Tequila, as part of a nutritious breakfast,” and it would be just as valid.

“It’s good food to keep them going.”

Translation: I like to hop my kids up on sugar before sending them out into the world.

“Every jar is made of wholesome all natural ingredients. 106 hazelnuts, a whole cup of skim milk, and a hint of delicious cocoa.”

Riiiiiight. Hazelnuts (exactly 106, for some reason), skim milk, and a hint of cocoa. Hmmm, do you really believe that’s all that’s in Nutella? If so, try this: grab 106 hazelnuts, one cup of skim milk, and a dash of cocoa, throw them in a blender, liquify, and drink. When you are done gagging on that, come on back here…

Do you have a jar of Nutella in your house? If so, go read the ingredients. I’ll wait.

Don’t have one? Ok, Let me list the ingredients for you – remember, ingredients are listed from most to least used in the food:

  • Sugar
  • Modified Palm Oil
  • Hazelnuts
  • Cocoa
  • Skim Milk
  • Reduced Minerals Whey
  • Soy Lecithin: An Emulsifier
  • Vanillin: An Artificial Flavor

That’s right, the number on ingredient is sugar! Number 2 is oil.

Interestingly, the ad stresses that there is a cup of whole milk and a “hint” of cocoa, but according to the ingredients there is more cocoa than milk.

If you want to feed your kids (or yourself) high sugar stuff, I have no problem with that. Just make it a conscious choice, and not as a result of some ploy by a company to pass off their sugar laden food as “healthy.”

“Nutella has no preservatives or artificial colors and is a source of vitamin E.”

I thought this was the one good thing Nutella had going for it. Then I realized that one of the ingredients is “Vanillin: An Artificial Flavor.” So Nutella has no artificial colors or preservatives, but it does have artificial flavor? Tricky tricky…

“I make sure Nutella’s always part of their breakfast.”

Always? Always?? Of course, because nothing says “I love you” like childhood obesity…Ok, that may sound harsh, but if you saw an ad for Cap ‘N Crunch cereal where a woman tried to pass it off as healthy and said she made sure to always include it with her breakfast, you would sprain your wrist dialing child services.

I’ll admit it, I’m not a parent, but I have seen my friends try to get their kids to eat, and I know it can be a chore. And I am not some kind of health food extremist who thinks kids should be deprived of all sorts of tasty junk food (hell, I grew up on it!).

My issue here, as with the Taco Bell diet, is not that Nutella is not healthy, but rather that the company is trying to trick you into thinking it is. The ads want you to not think. The ads want you to blindly follow what they say.

In a nutshell, the ads want you to be stupid.

Don’t fall for it. Take some responsibility. Do some research. Read the nutrition info. And apply some common sense: if something tastes like a melted down Hershey bar with hazelnuts, chances are it’s not healthy!

Well, now that I’ve got that off my chest, I feel like making myself a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Hey, I said it was unhealthy – I never said it wasn’t delicious!

Posted in Motivation & Success | Tagged | 15 Comments

Give “The Simple” Everything You’ve Got

Posted on January 20, 2010 by Avish

growingyourbusinessSometimes success can be just plain simple. In fact, it often has to be simple.

This Saturday, January 23rd, my chapter of the National Speakers Association will be putting on the full day Growing Your Business with Mark LeBlanc at the Renaissance Philadelphia hotel. It is a great program that any small business owner or independent professional needs to attend.

I have seen Mark’s program, and I have his book, Growing Your Business. The last page of the book has this very simple bit of advice:

Give “The Simple” everything you’ve got.

This is a powerful bit of advice that everyone would do well to follow (I have written on the concept of the simple before in my post, Success Can Be Simple, But Maybe Not Easy…).

Mark’s book and program are “simple,” but very effective. The point he is making is that the key to success is to trust the process and then focus on simple activities you can do daily, weekly, and monthly to build momentum and make progress.

Now is the time of year when people are running around making grand resolutions to completely turn their life around. Mark calls these “Great Commitments.” You’ve seen them. You’ve done them. Heck, you may be in the middle of one right now!

They’ll be familiar: “As of today, I will workout two hours a day and eat nothing but healthy food!” “Starting Monday I will make 100 cold calls a day!” “I am committed! I will absolutely write 4,000 words per day on my novel, everyday until it is done!”

Nice ideas. The problem is that they rarely last. To quote Mark, “these commitments and resolutions are usually broken in a short period of time.”

A much better idea is to keep it simple, stupid. Identify the simple things that:

  1. Will progress you towards your goal, even if occasionally no progress seems to being made (trust the process!)
  2. You can do on a very regular basis.

This approach will:

  1. Build Momentum
  2. Build habits
  3. Move you towards your goal

Take a look at the resolutions or goals you have made this year (whether you have gotten off track or not). Are they simple? Are they things that can be done regularly? Will they lead to long term success?

If not, and if and when you find your energy and focus on “the great commitments” failing, try switching to simple activities you can do every day.

And remember: Give “The Simple” everything you’ve got!

To hear more of Mark’s awesome wisdom (straight from the horse’s mouth!” sign up now to attend Growing Your Business at the Renaissance Philadelphia hotel on Saturday, January 23rd.

When: Saturday, January 23, 8am-5pm
Where: Renaissance Philadelphia

Registration:
Non-members and guests: $159 (a $499 value)
NSA Philadelphia Members: $129 (a $499 value)

And here’s a video from the man himself:

More info and sign up here!

Posted in Business Advice, Motivation & Success | Leave a comment

Lessons from TV’s Masters of Improvisation

Posted on January 19, 2010 by Avish

The ability to improvise is a wondrous thing. It can help you out with so many situations, big or small.

To give you a few ideas on how you can improve the quality of your “life improvisations,” let’s take a look at some classic masters of improvisation from the fictional world of television…

(Note: I did not include anyone from “Whose Line Is It Anyway?” because that’s a real improv comedy show and this list is about fictional characters improvising on their shows. So get over it…)

Jack Bauer

24

Are you ready to "get Jacked!" ?

Are you ready to "get Jacked!" ?


Let’s get this out right up front: Jack Bauer is the most awesome character on any TV show ever. There are so many reasons to love Jack: he’s a badass. He can die – yes, actually die – and come back in under an hour to continue fighting terrorists. He has the direct number of not one, but two presidents. He can get anyone to do anything simply by saying in a raspy voice, “there’s no time to explain.” And, he is a great improviser.

Oh sure, these days Jack’s improvs consist mostly of what household devices he can use to torture suspects. but back in the day, he was a quick thinking machine.

Just watch Season 1 where he has to break a guy out of jail. (warning: season 1 spoilers! But come on, that’s from 8 years ago…) First he pretends to assault the guy and choke him, but he is actually stuffing a piece of paper with a phone number in his mouth. Then he gets back in the room again assault the guy again, only this is a ruse to lift the key from one of the officers who breaks the fight up. Brilliant.

The first few seasons of 24 seemed to revolve around, “let’s put Jack in an impossible situation and see how he gets out.” He had to use all of his badass improv skills to do it.

He’s like the MacGyver of counter-terrorism

Fatal Flaw: He is a bit violent. And people around him have a tendency to get killed.

Lesson: Look to what’s immediately at hand. – When the unexpected happens, there’s no point whining about what you wish you had, or what “should” have happened. Take a cue from Jack: what’s done is done. What can you do right now with the resources you have available to you right now to get you what you want?

The Professor

Gilligan’s Island

How come we never saw the Professor making the world’s best Pina Colada?

How come we never saw the Professor making the world’s best Pina Colada?


If you think of improvising as “thinking quickly and immediately on your feet,” (a fair definition), then maybe the Professor doesn’t qualify. If, however, you think of improvising as, “making the most of what you have,” (also a fair definition) the Professor may be the gold standard.

Was there anything this dude couldn’t make out of coconuts? I understand that the show was supposed to end with Professor crafting a Flux Capacitor out of coconuts, palm trees, and Ms. Howell’s jewelry that would take them all back in time before they got shipwrecked. But the show got canceled before they could do that. Oh well…

He’s like the MacGyver of coconuts.

Fatal Flaw: For some reason, he never even bothered to try to simply create a transmitter. Or a boat. Or patching to fix the old boat. Or a raft. Or a phone. Or anything that would have gotten them rescued.

Lesson: Remember the big picture – Improvising isn’t just about taking immediate action; it’s about taking the right immediate action. Before you start responding to a crisis, ask yourself, “is this the best way I can spend my time and energy to deal with this situation and get the result I want?”

i.e. Don’t get caught up making coconut explosive when you could build a boat.

Sydney Bristow

Alias

The first two seasons of Alias are as good as anything that has ever been on TV. Seriously. Go check it out.

The first two seasons of Alias are as good as anything that has ever been on TV. Seriously. Go check it out.


Jennifer Garner’s Sydney Bristow is the coolest TV spy ever. J.J. Abrams hit his stride with this show and established himself as an amazing action writer, director, and producer. So much so that when he did Mission Impossible: III he simple lifted huge segments of the Alias Pilot’s story and shots.

Sydney was an ass-kicking quick-thinking super spy. Pretty much every episode during the first two seasons involved Sydney going on a mission, having something go wrong, and then having her have to improvise her way out of it. Sometimes that took the form of simple beating people up. Sometimes she got a little (or a lot) more creative, like leaping off a fifth floor balcony into a swimming pool or communicating in Morse code via blinking. Such is the life of a super double agent.

She also gets bonus points for the simple fact that many of her improvs involved her wearing skimpy clothing. I’m just saying…

She’s like the MacGyver of spies.

Fatal Flaw: Occasional Extremism Look, just ’cause you come up with a brilliant creative solution to a pressing problem doesn’t mean you have to implement it. The season finale of season 2 ends with Sydney waking up after a fight in Hong Kong, which is not where the fight was – that was in L.A., so this is a bit of a development. Turns out, this is two years after the fight – she has no memory of the past two years!

Great cliffhanger, stupid resolution. We find out that Sydney wiped her own mind because she discovered some “secret” and was afraid of that knowledge getting out. So of course, the logical thing to do is to completely wipe her memory of the last two years Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight…

From an “in-story” stand-point, this was plain stupiditude. Did she not stop to think that, “hey, if I wipe two years of memories, won’t I, super spy and all around inquisitive gal devote my life to figuring out what happened?” Well she should’ve, ’cause that’s what she did. Again, I say the lesson here is just because you can do something doesn’t mean you should do it.

Frankly, I think the writer’s introduced the memory loss angle with no idea of where they were going. When it started to go nowhere they introduced this stupid “I did it to myself” plot turn just to end it off. But I digress…

Lesson: Keep moving forward – What I loved about Alias was how things kept moving. As a character, Sydney was excellent at making progress, not just settling for activity. This is a lesson for us all – when Ding Happens it is imperative that we keep moving towards our goals, and not getting paralyzed and stuck in the mud.

Gregory House

House

Ok, this is a creepy picture. But he gets the job done, right?

Ok, this is a creepy picture. But he gets the job done, right?


An improvising doctor! House uses his considerable medical knowledge to test theories that normal medical conventions would never allow. Things like placing a metal scalpel on a kids stomach to find out where a magnet was (instead of cutting him open), lacing his hands with some chemical that turned a woman’s hands purple to prove she was poisoning her husband with gold, creatively lying (a lot) to get patients to tell the truth, doing tequila shots with a patient to remove a poison, etc…

Sure, House is a jerk and I am sure that the mysteries and solutions on the show are medically dubious at best. But for a fictional doctor, this guy is a master improviser. House could detect a rare cellular level disorder using nothing more than some duct tape and a pocket knife.

He’s like the MacGyver of doctors.

Fatal Flaw: He’s a jerk. And he’s always super confident, even when he’s wrong. If he was a real doc, he would most likely have been fired and jailed years ago for killing a patient due to a reckless procedure.

Lesson: Diagnostics can be creative too When we think about “using our creativity,” we usually try to think of creative things to do.

However, one of the best ways to use our creativity effectively is to use creative approaches to diagnose a problem. Don’t just ask the same questions over and over (especially if you are not getting any good answers). Mix it up, attack the problem from different angles, and throw out unique questions, even if they don’t seem to make sense. They will allow you to see and find solutions you never would have before.

Angus MacGyver

MacGyver

In junior high, MacGyver was hands down my favorite show. And for good reason. I had never even heard of improv comedy, but I was drawn to the master of the form...

In junior high, MacGyver was hands down my favorite show. And for good reason. I had never even heard of improv comedy, but I was drawn to the master of the form...


Was there any doubt? MacGyver’s entire TV show was based on putting him in situations where he would have to improvise. And improvise he did! Sealing chemical leaks, making bombs (lots and lots of bombs), creating a home made lie detector, rigging craps dice, making a magnifying glass out of water, fixing all sorts of machines with almost no tools or equipment, and many, many, more.

How many other TV shows turned their title and main character name into multiple spin off words:

  • MacGyverism noun – Anything cool MacGyver made or did. By extension, anything cool you do or make out of nothing. ex: “I fixed my car with duct tape, chewing gum, and a box of Good ‘N Plenties. It’s like one big MacGyverism”
  • MacGyver verb – To fix or create something out of completely unrelated parts. To make do without. ex: “We had no wine opener so I MacGyvered the bottle using a candle and chef’s knife.”

Sure, the effectiveness of his experiments was exaggerated, and the writers always left one key ingredient out of the explosives (in some cases, it seemed like the ingredient they left was, “an explosive”) so people didn’t run around at home blowing themselves up, but boy, there was some crazy creative stuff.

MacGyver made it cool to be nerdy (at least, that’s what I told myself back in the day). And he never used guns (except once, in the pilot) and wasn’t much of a fighter. He was truly a “brains over brawn” kind of guy, and TV’s first and best master of improv.

He’s like the MacGyver of MacGyvers.

Fatal Flaw: He ran out of ideas. Technically, I think the writers ran out of ideas. In later seasons he stopped making cool chemical and mechanical stuff and would just do things like, “knock out the bad guy by turning on the dry cleaning rack.” Still a thinking man’s operative, but not nearly as fun.

Lesson: Expertise matter when it comes to improvising. MacGyver was able to do so much cool stuff because he was brilliant. In order to know that chocolate bars can seal a chemical leak, you have to know the chemical make up of chocolate, the chemical make up of the leaking liquid, and how those two things would react when combined. Many of MacGyver’s MacGyverisms cam from a deep of understanding of chemistry or mechanics.

In the same way, the more knowledgeable and experienced you are in your field, the easier time you will have improvising and rolling with the unexpected.

Did I leave off of any other Masters of Improvisation from TV? If so, please share yours in the comments!

Posted in Ding!, Lists, Motivation & Success | Tagged | 1 Comment

New Years Resolution: Increase the Quality of Your Procrastination

Posted on January 18, 2010 by Avish

Have your New Years Resolutions fallen by the wayside yet?

If so, let me share with you one of mine that you may want to adopt:

Increase the Quality of Your Procrastination

(Note: this one is only good if the resolution you let fall by the wayside was “stop procrastinating”)

Procrastination has been an issue with me for many, many, many years. Quite often around new years I will say, “ok, this is it! No more procrastinating.” That usually lasts for 7 hours.

This year, I am starting much smaller: I just want to procrastinate in better ways.

For example, the worst manifestation of procrastination for me was sitting on the couch and watching TV. I would sit there and think to myself, “I really should get up and do some work, or clean my condo, or go workout.” Usually, the TV would win out.

So this year, I have decided to not try to force myself to stop procrastinating (that goal wasn’t working anyway). Instead, I have come up with a list of activities that may still fall under the category of “procrastinating” but are, to me, much better than sitting in the couch watching TV. Unless it was to watch something new that I am into and planned on watching (like the new season of 24!), sitting like a lump watching TV always left me with a feeling like I had wasted some life. Not a good feeling.

Here are a few of the things on my list:

  1. Reading – I love to read, but I usually only do it before bed. By making reading a TV alternative, I am doing something that makes me feel good, even if it is a “procrastinating activity.” Plus, I learn when I read, and I also get ideas for a blog posts. It’s win-win-win.
  2. Playing computer games – Yup, the nerd in me comes out. There is very little productive that comes out of playing computer games, but for me (and those are the two operative words there, “for me”) this is higher quality form of procrastination than TV. It’s interactive, and requires some engagement, thought, and even problem-solving (at least for the games I play). I also have to be “sitting up” as opposed to “laying down” – hey, it’s the little things that count!
  3. Web surfing – This only one small step above TV, but an important one. As with the games, I have to be sitting up. Plus, surfing does lead to reading, and I will occasional learn something or get an idea for a blog post. Also, since I am on my computer, I may feel inspired to write, send some emails, or engage in other work. It has happened.

The key is that it’s not about perfection, it’s about progress.

I recently read a book where the author says, “if you love what you do enough you won’t have time for TV, surfing, video games, etc.” I agree with the sentiment and if that works for you, awesome! Go for it. But I am guessing that there are many people like me who love what they do but still fall into procrastination simply because over the course of our lives we have built that habit.

To change, therefore, we don’t need an external motivator which can go away (i.e. the project that has us fired up for now), but rather we need need to change that inner habit. The standard approach is to try a massive shift. This approach usually fails. I am proposing a slow change that will eventually change your habits to a point to get you to automatically go in the direction of your passion and dreams.

Try the “big change” approach. If and when that fails, try this:

  1. Identify your worst procrastinating behavior – For me it was watching TV. What’s yours?
  2. Make a list – Come up with a few things you could do instead that seem less overwhelming than, “spend five hours working towards my dream.” They should be fun (for you), and slightly more “self-satisfying” (for you) than the activity you are looking to replace.
  3. Replace the activity – When you find yourself falling into your old procrastination habit, replace the activity with the new, slightly better one.
  4. Repeat – Keep doing this until the new habit seems more natural than the old one. Then you may want to repeat by replacing this new habit with even better one, and so on and so on. Of course, I have a feeling that by doing this you may find yourself jumping some of the smaller steps automatically (but don’t force it!)

This approach may or may not work for you. But if you have spent years trying to no avail to overcome your procrastinating tendencies, why not give it a shot? You have nothing to lose!

Posted in Motivation & Success | Tagged | 4 Comments

5 Stupid Things You May Not Realize Are Killing Your Productivity

Posted on January 15, 2010 by Avish

Who doesn’t want to be more productive? If you can get more done in less time, that allows you to…um…well…get more done. And that’s a good thing, because you either move towards your goals faster or have more time to spend on other things, like family, friends, and reading my blog.

Rather than passing on the same old productivity advice you’ll read everywhere (it’s good, but you can…um…well…read it anywhere) I am going to share with you a few simple things that you may not have thought of before to make your day more productive.

Here are 5 stupid things you may not realize are killing your productivity:

Cheese Fries

How can something look simultaneously disgusting and delicious?? <br /> (Photo by Choctopus)

How can something look simultaneously disgusting and delicious??
(Photo by Choctopus)

Ok, cheese fries is just one example of a bad food that can kill your productivity. I hate the fact that I am writing this because I have spent the last however many years eating whatever the heck I want. As I get older, I have definitely noticed how the quality and quantity of what I eat affects my productivity.

If I want a productive afternoon I have learned to not eat the “General Tso’s chicken + fried rice + egg roll combination” from my local Chinese restaurant. If I want a productive morning, I have learned that “a burger, fries, and two beers” for a late dinner the night before is a killer.

You don’t need to go vegan and start drinking fresh Juiceman Jr. juice. Just make a few changes and see if that doesn’t increase your productivity.

Motivational Speakers

Not all motivational speakers are created equal

Not all motivational speakers are created equal


What?! How can I blame motivational speakers? Aren’t I one?

Well, yes, but I am not here to blow smoke up your a@$. The great thing about motivational speakers is that they get you to believe that you can achieve anything. The bad thing about motivational speakers is that they get you to believe you can achieve anything.

I am all for big dreams, but there is a big gap between today’s motivation and tomorrow’s dream fulfillment. The bigger the dream, the easier it is to tumble into that gap. Having a dream is awesome, but if you feel depressed and unmotivated when you think about it (“it’s too big! I’ll never make it!”) then that kills your productivity. Focus on a smaller, more manageable, more achievable goal for the short term to build some momentum.

Also, the bigger your time horizon, the easier it is to put things off “just one day.” If my goal is to have a 100,000 word novel done in two years, procrastinating until tomorrow isn’t that big a deal – it’s only one of 730 days (731 if it’s leap year)! But if my goal is to write a chapter a month, or 1,000 words a week, each daily task becomes more important.

Reading or listening to a lot of motivational material can be a good thing, but only if it empowers you. If it depresses you, well then you may want to let it go.

Inertia

We don’t all have the luxury of succumbing to inertia <br /> (photo by g-hat)

We don’t all have the luxury of succumbing to inertia
(photo by g-hat)


A body at rest tends to stay at rest, and my body likes to rest! Once I get settled into my couch with some good (or “so bad it’s good”) TV, it can be tough to get going again. Thoughts of, “I should get up and write that blog post” are quickly followed by, “That’s hard. And a lot of work. Let’s give up.”

The corollary is that a body in motion tends to stay in motion. I have found when I simply say, “ok, just get up and go sit at the computer,” or the even simpler, “just turn the TV off, even if you switch it back on again,” those things actually happen. Sometimes I’ll sit at the computer and still not be productive, and sometimes I’ll just flip the TV back on and plop back on the couch five minutes later, and that’s ok. The goal is to start managing inertia. Quite often, however, some productivity takes place.

When you’re feeling very unmotivated and unproductive, stop focusing on “getting things done” and just focus on “overcoming inertia.”

The Thermostat

Yes, sometimes it can be too cold to be productive

Yes, sometimes it can be too cold to be productive


Little variations on temperature can greatly affect your focus and productivity.

Let’s face it: when it gets a few degrees too cold, all you want to do is breathe on your fingers until you can feel them again. Or curl up somewhere under a blanket with a hot cup of tea. And when it’s too hot, you want to lay around like a lump, because the heat saps your energy like Shang Tsung sucking your soul in Mortal Kombat.

If you work from home or are the boss, this is an easy fix – adjust your clothing or thermostat accordingly. If you are not in charge, adjust your attire or talk the people who are in charge about setting the temperature. But couch it in terms of your productivity (something that affects the company) rather than your comfort (something they are paying you to not care about 🙂 )

If the tell you to suck it up, well, I guess you’ll have to suck it up. And maybe start looking for another job.

Your Already Awesome Productivity

Activity and progress are not the same thing. just ask Sisyphus. <br /> (Photo by diametrik)

Activity and progress are not the same thing. just ask Sisyphus.
(Photo by diametrik)


Yes, at times your current ability to get things done may be hampering your overall productivity.

Productivity is not efficiency. Some people are so good at “doing” that they keep themselves busy all the time, and then are stunned when they make little progress (at least relative to the amount of work put in). There’s a big difference between activity and progress. Between doing things and doing the right things. Don’t get so caught up in “getting things done” that you forget to step back and make sure you are doing the most important and effective things to get you where you want to go.

Posted in Business Advice, Lists, Motivation & Success | Tagged | 1 Comment

No One Cares About Your Internal Company Contest!

Posted on January 14, 2010 by Avish

Photo by KirrilyRobert

Photo by KirrilyRobert

Do you want customers to do you favors? If so, first you have to earn that right…

The other day, I was standing in the Express Lane at what will remain an unnamed supermarket.

Let me correct that: I was standing in the least express-like Express Lane at what often feels like the least efficient supermarket in a 50 mile radius of where I live.

I feel like fate was conspiring against me that day. The store was much more crowded than I expected at that time so all the lines were long. To make it worse, the people in front of me were not helping bag. There should be a law: if you are in the Express Lane and there is no designated bagger, you better get your butt down to the end of the conveyor belt and help bag your groceries. “Express” is a collaborative process people; let’s all do our part.

The employee working the lane also seemed to be pretty inefficient. As I eagerly awaited my turn, I remember thinking to myself, “wow, this is slow. She must be new.”

It finally gets to my turn…almost…because you see, just as I think the woman will turn her attention to my groceries, the man in front of me makes a comment to her that smacks of small talk. The small talk lasted only about 15 seconds, but for the love of God people! When the store is crowded and the lines are five, six, seven people deep, do not – I repeat: DO NOT take away the cashier’s attention with small talk! Especially when your turn is over. Move along people, move along! But I digress…

So now it’s my turn to be rung up by what I assume is a relatively new employee. Then I notice that she has a little badge attached to her nametag:

“20+ years”

Wow.

I would have bet money – real cash money – that she was new. I would have lost that bet worse than Apollo Creed lost to Ivan Drago in Rocky IV.

20+ years! But she was ponderous. I’ll admit, I’ve never worked as a supermarket checkout person, but I would guess somewhere around year 17 you would start to remember the code for “Red Delicious Apples” and not have to pause while you figured it out. I’m just saying.

She finally finished my order and now I am awaiting my receipt. It prints out, and then the woman looks at it, makes an indecipherable sound, and then hands me three stickers and explains to me that I have been selected to complete a survey. Yippee. I have no interest in this survey, and I am feeling for the people behind me who have to wait while she explains it to me.

The explanation (which in and of itself felt longer than the director’s cut of Blade Runner) led up to her taking the time to say to me, “…and there’s a contest between the locations so if you give us all fives for the service you received we can beat the other stores.”

Wow.

I think after she said that she mumbled something about me getting additional coupons if I completed the survey, but I had mentally checked out of the whole process a long time earlier. But clearly to her, I should be motivated to complete this survey to help her store beat the other stores.

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight…

Suffice it to say, I did not call the number to complete the survey. If I had, you can bet I would not have given them “5s” across the board, just so their store could, in her words, “beat Paoli.”

I walked out of there a bit stunned that I could get bad service and then be asked to take the time to complete a survey – not honestly either, but rather to just give them “5s” on that service – so that she and her store could beat a competing store.

I think there are some lessons we can all takeaway from this:

Do Your Actions Match Your Message?

In supermarket parlance, the “express lane” is simply a lane for people with fewer items. That’s about as far as they go towards making it an “express.” They evidently don’t put faster checkout on those lanes, or create any other systems to make it more express-like. They can get away with it because they are monolithic corporations that are happy with the status quo.

How about you? Does your “great customer service” just mean that you smile when you interact, or do all of your actions support the message? If your business name has the word “Easy” (or the not-as-cool-as-you-think version, “EZ”) in it, is working with you actually easy? If you are the “Bank of America,” can accounts opened in one states be easily accessed and managed from other states? (I’m not saying I have any experience with that issue…)

Words are easy. Actions to back up the words is what makes the difference.

You Do Realize That No One Cares About You, Right?

Ok, I am sure that some people care about you and your business. But the average customer or prospect who knows nothing about you? No, they don’t care. At all. Especially about your internal organizational contest.

Ergo, you should never try to sell someone on anything based on how it will benefit you. Always try to persuade people based on what’s in it for them.

The exception to this is if you are a boy or girl scout trying to sell stuff to win a prize. In this case the puppy dog eyes can get people buying stuff from you just to help you out. It works for kids. For adults, “sales through pity” is not a solid marketing strategy.

This is sales, service, marketing, and relationships 101, but many, many people seemed to have missed that course.

Are You Building Relationships?

Speaking of relationships, there are some contexts where I will go out of my way to help someone win an internal contest that has nothing to do with me.

A few years ago I became a regular at the bar across from where I lived (this should surprise you not at all). Being a regular, I was often served by the same waitress. I noticed that she kept pushing the Stella Artois beer on us when me and my friends would go in. When we asked her about it, she told us that there was a sales contest involving Stella. From that point on, I was happy to order Stella from her. Why? Two reasons:

  1. I liked the server.
  2. I liked Stella Artois, so it was no skin off my back.

Building a little relationship and not asking for much is a great way to get people to do what you want, even if it doesn’t help them out directly.

This doesn’t have to happen over a long time span. I posted a little while ago about getting some awful service from a towing company. The alternate tow truck driver I went with was nice and helped me out, so when he asked me to pay in cash I happily went three minutes out of my way to cross the street and hit an ATM.

On the flip side, the supermarket checkout person was moving slow and hadn’t built any rapport. Which was ok, because I feel that with her speed (or lack thereof), if she tried to build rapport with me it would have further delayed the process.

A little rapport goes a long way. People will help you out if they feel connected to you. Get in the habit of building mini-relationships with every customer and prospect you come across.

Be consistent, focus on the customer, and build relationships. The keys to business success aren’t complicated – you just need to remember to do them!

Posted in Business Advice | Tagged | 5 Comments

Funny Motivation: 5 MORE Great Motivational Songs From 80s Movies

Posted on January 13, 2010 by Avish

Could you use a little shot of “Motivational Smartassery” now that the holidays are over? If so, you’re in luck!

A few weeks ago I posted, 5 Great Motivational Songs From 80’s Movies. Since then, people have pointed out to me some other great songs and I also happened to remember a few more.

So, since it’s the start of the new year and I am sure everyone can use a motivational kick in the pants to not drop their resolutions on day 13, here are 5 more great motivational songs from 80s movies:

The Touch

Movie: Transformers (the 80s cartoon, not the new live action one)
Artist: Stan Bush

You’re at your best when when the goin’ gets rough
You’ve been put to the test, but it’s never enough

You got the touch
You got the power

I absolutely can not believe I left this off of the first list. This is not just a great “motivational song,” this is not just a great song “from an 80s movie,” and this is not just a great song “from a cartoon.” This is a great song, period. End of discussion. That’s it. This is music gold.

And it is an awesome motivational song. It has everything you want in motivational music: Heavy beat. Gratuitous screaming. And cliches. Oh, the cliches! Every single line in this song is designed for one purpose: to pump you up!

And if you’ve seen the movie (I have, and am not ashamed to admit it) the song is even more awesome, ’cause it’s used in the best scene from the whole flick. Optimus Prime basically kicks all the Decepticons’ butts himself.

It’s not that it’s good. It’s that it’s soooo good…

(Oooh, I get chills just watching the opening…)

Bonus Motivational Lyrics:
You got the touch
You got the power

When all hell’s breakin’ loose
You’ll be riding the eye of the storm

You got the heart
You got the motion

You know that when things get too tough
You got the touch

Wikipedia Trivia Note: “Transformers: The Movie” is the last film Orson Welles worked on. Welles wrote, directed, and starred in what is often considered the greatest movie of all time, and his last flick was “Transformers.” He told his biographer, “You know what I did this morning? I played the voice of a toy.” Nice.

I Need a Hero

Movie: Footloose
Artist: Bonnie Tyler

I’m holding out for a hero ’til the end of the night
He’s gotta be strong
And he’s gotta be fast
And he’s gotta be fresh from the fight

To be fair, this isn’t lyrically a very motivational song. The entire premise of the song is that Bonnie Tyler is hanging around waiting for a hero to come along. That’s not motivational, that’s flat out disempowering. If it was motivational she would be out there doing her own thing. Or at least going out and actively finding a hero, not just “holding out” for one. I’m sure modern day women must love the sentiment in this song.

No, it’s not the lyrics. The motivational element in this song comes from two places:

  1. The music, which is awesome
  2. The fact that all us men fully believe that we are that hero

So ladies, you may want to pass on this one. Though for your viewing pleasure, I did include the clip from Footloose so you can enjoy looking at Kevin Bacon (song starts at 1:45):

Bonus Motivational Lyrics:
I need a hero
I’m holding out for a hero ’til the morning light
He’s gotta be sure
And it’s gotta be soon
And he’s gotta be larger than life

Wikipedia Trivia Note: The role of Ariel, played in Footloose by Lori “don’t call me the Beastmaster’s sister” Singer was offered to Daryl Hannah, Elizabeth McGovern, Melanie Griffith, Michelle Pfeiffer, Jamie Lee Curtis, Rosanna Arquette, Meg Tilly, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Heather Locklear, Meg Ryan, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Jodie Foster, Phoebe Cates, Tatum O’Neal, Bridget Fonda, Lori Loughlin, Diane Lane and Brooke Shields. They all turned it down. Amazingly, as successful as Footloose was, looking at their careers, you kind of have to say they all made the right choice.

On Our Own

Movie: Ghostbusters 2
Artist: Bobbie Brown

Now I find out that nothing is given
Don’t know where the cards may fall
All I know is that we’ve gotta get it
We’ve gotta make it on our own

This is easily the song I am most embarrassed to feature on either this list or the original. But hey, I’m secure enough to admit it: I dig this song. Frankly, looking back on the 80s and early 90s, I guess I’d have to say I like a lot of Bobby Brown songs. There’s a thought that’s going to keep me up at night.

From a motivational stand point, I like songs where the singer basically says, “whatever, I’ll do it myself.” Even if that is a Bobby Brown song featured in an awful sequel to one of the best comedies ever.

Bonus Motivational Lyrics:
Now can’t you see that all we need to be a go-getter
Gotta make your own decisions, you gotta go for what ya know
It comes a time in our lives, you wanna be bigger
Gotta keep, keep on pushing, you gotta learn to take control, yeah

Wikipedia Trivia Note: One time a friend made a movie reference I didn’t catch, and when I asked he said, “it’s from Ghostbusters 2!” as if I clearly should have known that. I’m not saying we’re not friends anymore, but I’m also not saying we are. I know this is neither from Wikipedia nor any trivia you would care to know, but I feel there’s a lesson here: incredulity has its limits; being unbelieving that someone didn’t catch a Ghostbusters 2 reference is clearly beyond that limit.

Winner Takes It All

Movie: Over The Top
Artist: Sammy Hagar

‘Cause the winner takes it all
Loser takes a fall
Fight to the beginning of the end
Winner takes it all
‘Till he breaks the fall
In time he’ll make it over the top

Here’s another truly awesome song I am ashamed I left off the first list. Terrible movie, but an awesome song.

Whatever success this movie had it came from two sources:

  1. The awesomitude that is this song. There have definitely been movies where a song has driven ticket sales. This is one.
  2. Stallone. If there’s one thing Stallone could do, it was make ridiculously awesome 80’s movies. Rocky III & IV, the Rambos…and Over the Top. It’s a movie about arm wrestling! Who else could have pulled that off?? Maybe Schwarzenneger. Maybe…

How awesome would a Sammy Hagar led Van Halen cover of this song be? (Heck, for all I know they’ve done that in concert)

Bonus Motivational Lyrics:
Hey
You listen when I say
There’s a dream
Oh that’s comin’ true today yeah
Never turn away
When the challenge is alive
The choice is yours to make
In every chance you take

Wikipedia Trivia Note: This is the opening line of the Wikipedia entry for Over the Top: “Over the Top is a 1987 dramatic film.” Dramatic film? That’s like saying MTV’s Jersey Shore is a documentary.

Flashdance…What A Feeling

Movie: Flashdance
Artist: Irene Cara

What a feeling, bein’s believin’
I can’t have it all, now I’m dancin’ for my life
Take your passion, and make it happen
Pictures come alive, you can dance right through your life

I’ll be honest: I have not actually seen Flashdance. Sure, I know it’s about a steel worker who dances and has dreams about a better life or something and who I think occasionally dumps water on herself while dancing like a stripper. But I haven’t seen it.

I have, however, heard “What a Feeling,” many, many times. You have to admit that if there’s a song written purely to motivate, this is it. From the uplifting music, to Irene Cara’s passion, to the very inspirational lyrics, this really is the motivational speaker’s theme song.

What it lacks in “awesome pumpitude” it more than makes up for in “utter upliftingness.” I may not throw this song onto the MP3 player when I’m getting ready for a set of heavy squats, but it’s a hell of a great song to listen to when I’m feeling down.

Bonus Motivational Lyrics:
First, when there’s nothing but a slow glowing dream
That your fear seems to hide deep inside your mind
All alone I have cried silent tears full of pride
In a world made of steel, made of stone

Well I hear the music, close my eyes, feel the rhythm
Wrap around, take a hold of my heart

Wikipedia Trivia Note: Another famous song from Flashdance was Michael Sembello’s “Maniac.” That song was inspired by the 1980 horror movie “Maniac.” It was originally written about an actual maniac – that kind that goes around killing people. They changed the lyrics to be less…er…stabby. For example, the lines, “She’s a maniac, maniac on the floor / And she’s dancing like she’s never danced before,” were originally, “He’s a maniac, maniac that’s for sure / He will kill your cat and nail him to the door.” Yup, that was Sembello’s original vision: “kill your cat and nail him to the door.” Astonishing that he never had a follow up hit…

Posted in Just Funny, Motivation & Success | Tagged | 15 Comments

Audio Interview: Turning a Whole Bunch of Random Content Into a Great Speech

Posted on January 12, 2010 by Avish

My friend Mike (of Game Music, Inc. – guess what his company does…?) recently had to give a short, but rather important talk. He started off strong and came up with some good ideas and an overall theme, but then he hit a wall. Mike got very stuck trying to figure out how to put all the pieces together into a cohesive speech that would make his point while holding the audience’s attention.

Feeling stuck, he did what any sane person would do: he called his buddy Avish (for you new readers, that’s me).

I spent a little time with Mike and helped him put all of his crazy thoughts into a format that worked for him. The end result? A home run presentation (I’m not making that up – I was in the audience)

A week or two after the speech, I sat down and spoke with Mike about the entire process of putting that talk together. In the interview, we cover both what he did to get started and also what he and I did together to get him past his sticking points.

If you are putting together a speech of any kind and find yourself getting stuck, you will definitely pick up some great info from this interview. Even if you don’t have a specific presentation coming up, you should give this a listen; there are a lot of great insights into both the creative process and also the method I use when crafting speeches.

Here’s the audio:

Speech Creation and Structuring Interview – MP3 format, approx 45 minutes, 36 MB
(“Right-click” and “save as” to download to your computer)

Enjoy!

P.S. Are you stuck in the process of creating a speech or other creative endeavor (marketing campaign, brand, etc.)? Do you think working with me the way I worked with Mike would help you? Then contact me now and we can talk about the specific details of how that works.

P.P.S.If you really want to kick your speaking up a few notches, you should sign up for this March’s Speaking School where you will receive four intense days of presentation skills training – there’s nothing else like it anywhere!

Posted in Audio, Talk Gooder | 3 Comments

The World Wants You to Be Stupid: The Taco Bell Drive-Thru Diet

Posted on January 11, 2010 by Avish

Note: This is the first in what may become a regular series on the idea that, “The World Wants You to Be Stupid” (TWWYTBS). TWWYTBS will highlight examples where businesses and other groups do things who’s success is based purely on the hope that the people watching them are stupid. Don’t succumb! And, if you have your own examples of TWWYTBS that you would like to either a)write up and share as a guest post or b) point out to me so that I can consider writing about it, please post in the comments or drop me a line letting me know.

Taco Bell now has a “Jared.”

In case you’re unfamiliar, Jared Fogle is a dude who went on a diet where he ate low fat Subway sandwiches for lunch and dinner everyday for two years and lost 240 pounds. Subway found out and made him their spokesman and launched an ad campaign around his story, and sales suddenly went way up.

It was a heartwarming story of a guy losing a lot of weight and becoming a success that astonishingly, never got too annoying.

Now Taco Bell has introduced “Christine.” She says, “I lost 54 pounds by reducing my daily calories, and replacing my usual fast food with Taco Bell’s Drive-Thru Diet.”

If you haven’t seen the ad, take a look:

Wow.

Here, my friends, is an ad campaign that truly hopes you are stupid. The hope is that you will not think too much, not read the fine print, and assume that by simply ordering off of Taco Bell’s “Fresco Menu,” that you can be like Christine or Jared.

Speaking of fine print, did you notice how almost every single shot in this ad has some kind of disclaimer at the bottom?

Let’s take a look at what Taco Bell is “disclaiming”:

  • “Her exceptional experience based on average 1250 cal/day”

    • 1250 calories per day? Look, I don’t know how tall she is, but anyone will lose weight eating only 1250 calories per day.

  • “150-340 calories. Not a low calorie food”

    • Ah, they want to make it clear that their “Fresco” menu is not low calorie. This disclaimer is in there because that’s obviously what the audio and video lead you to believe.

    Each item on the Fresco menu just replaces cheese and sour cream with salsa for a calorie reduction of 20-100 calories per item. That’s it. While it’s not a terrible idea to replace cheese and sour cream if you are trying to lose weight, it is not the basis for an entire diet. Besides, the rest of the food will still be Taco Bell quality.

  • “Her exceptional experience based on average 1250 cal/day. Average reduction of 500 cal/day over 2 years with sensible food choices”

    • Wow, they felt the need to repeat the “1250 cal/day” bit. They really want to cover their ass on why exactly Christine lost the weight.

    They also make no mention of how frequently Christine ate at Taco Bell. Was it everyday? Once a week? Once a month? How often does the Fresco Menu fit into “sensible food choices?”

    And am I the only one who finds it ironic that the words “sensible food choices” are in the same zip code as a Taco Bell ad…?

  • “Taco Bell Drive-Thru Diet is not a weight loss program. Pay attention to total calorie and fat intake and regular exercise”

    • And now, since the entire ad is set up to make you believe that this is a weight loss program, they must ad text saying it is not a weight loss program.

    On dictionary.com, the fourth, fifth and sixth definitions of the word, “diet,” are all variations on, “stuff people regularly eat.” By those definitions, I guess the Taco Bell Drive Thru Diet doesn’t need to be a weight loss program.

    But according to the first three definitions, along with how every English speaking person in world uses it, the word “diet” has to do with losing weight or improving health. You tack the word, “diet,” onto something and people are going to think weight loss.

    Oh, and if I was a real Smart Ass I would point out that the last line, “Pay attention to total calorie and fat intake and regular exercise,” is not encouraging us to actually exercise, but rather just wants us to pay attention to it. If I was a real Smart Ass…

So if Taco Bell has all these disclaimers, why do I believe that they actually want you to be stupid? Because here is what I think Taco Bell is hoping and assuming with this campaign:

  • People don’t read.

    • Taco Bell put the disclaimers on the ad for legal purposes, but they are betting that people won’t pay attention to them. They also post the disclaimers on their web site, but again, you have to actually visit the site and read them.

    If you just listen and watch the ad without reading the text, you will 100% believe that this is a weight loss program. Taco Bell is counting on it.

  • People don’t research.

    • A simple Google search on Taco Bell Diet will pull up lots of opinions and info on the Taco Bell plan. In under five minutes you can quickly learn what doctors, nutritionists, and other health experts think about it. You also learn additional important things like even though the items may have fewer calories, they have sky-high levels of sodium.

    Taco Bell is hoping you’ll just take their word for it and not investigate further. And they may be right, which is sad because that means that people won’t spend five minutes learning more about something that could directly impact their health.

  • People don’t do math.

    • Some of the items on the Fresco menu are 340 calories. If you are working on the 1250/day calorie plan and you eat two of those items, that’s more than half your calories for the day.

    According to the 2006 Program for International Student Assessment, U.S. teens are ranked 24th in the world in math. And according to Forbes.com, the U.S. is the 9th fattest country in the world.

    Coincidence? I don’t know, maybe you should ask Taco Bell.

  • People don’t think.

    • This is the big one. Some people will read the text, do a little research, do a little math, talk to their friends about it, but still buy into it anyway. Why? Because they don’t want to think. People will hear what they want to hear. “Being able to lose weight without giving up Taco Bell!? Awesome! Sign me up!”

    A little thought goes a long way. Not just in weight loss, but in everything.

Taco Bell wants you to be stupid. Don’t buy into it!

Posted in Motivation & Success | Tagged | 1 Comment

Meaningless Debates About Stupid Things That Don’t Matter Like, “What Side Do You Wear Your Nametag On?”

Posted on January 8, 2010 by Avish

Pop quiz hotshot: you go to a networking event. When you sign in, you are given a nametag. You peel the label off the back and now you have a choice. You can stick the nametag on the left or on the right. What do you do? What…do..you…do?

If you’re like most people, you say, “I put it on the left side.” If you’re like me, you say, “I put it on the left side, but who the hell cares?” But if you’re a “networking expert,” you say, “oh no no no no no – you are all sorely mistaken and are not networking as effectively as you could! Nametags should always be worn on the right side.”

I have heard this advice twice in my life now. Once, years ago, a colleague at an event told me, “you know someone’s really a sharp networker if they wear their nametag on the right side. That way it’s easier for people to read your name when you shake hands.” I guess I was a dull networker because mine was on the left. No worries though, because he took the initiative to move my nametag for me. Thank God! Who knows how many connections I missed because of that oversight.

This seemed like a silly detail, but I didn’t give much thought to this because it was only one person. Then, recently, I was reading a book on connecting with people written by a networking expert (best selling author at that!) and lo and behold! There it was again: the advice to always wear your nametag on the right side, and for the same reason. She said (and I’m paraphrasing here, because this was a library book and I don’t have it anymore), “wear your nametag on the right side so it is directly in the other person’s eyeline when you shake hands.”

Really?

Really?

REALLY?

“Directly in their eyeline when you shake hands?” This is a concern??

This resonates as nonsense to me for a few reasons.

First off, does the nametag disappear out of view completely when it’s on the left side? I think not.

Experiment #1: Put on two nametags, one on the left and one on the right. Walk up to a mirror. Extend your right hand as if you were about to shake. Now, slowly rotate your body to the left until you can a) not clearly read the left nametag but b) can still clearly read the right. Make a note of how far you are turned. Now ask yourself, “would I ever introduce myself to someone with my body contorted at this awkward angle?” I hope you answered “no.” If you answered, “yes,” perhaps you should join a carnival.

Second, how imperative is it to keep your name tag, “directly in their eyeline”? Experiment #2: Look straight ahead. Now, without moving your head at all, turn your eyes as far to the right as possible. Now turn your eyes to the left as far as possible. How hard was that? I know, it must have been exhausting. I’ll wait here while you get a cookie to rejuvenate yourself…

If you have your nametag on the right, sure it may be within my eyeline. If it’s on the left, I will have to *gasp* – shift my eyes slightly to the left. Oh, the effort! On the plus side, think of all the calories you’ll burn moving your eyes left and right.

Third, don’t people say their names when they shake hands, even while wearing nametags? I love it when people where nametags because it allows me to not let people know I’ve forgotten their names. But that happens without a handshake, so the whole, “right side to be in eyeline during handshakes” point doesn’t apply. Since people are saying their name anyway, making it a smidge easier for people to read your name while shaking hands seems a little moot, no?

Experiment #3: Go to an event where you wear a nametag. When you shake hands with people, just say, “hi,” and don’t offer your name. If people ask, “and you are…?” say, “can’t you read my nametag? I put it on the right side.” See how many networking connections you walk out with using that approach. For bonus points, try saying, “what’re you blind? I put my nametag on the right so you can read it, dumbass.” Note: do not try this approach at a sensitivity training workshop.

Fourth, if someone’s nametag is not clearly visible for whatever reason (their hair’s in the way, the clothing has folded over, they accidentally put it on upside down on the back of their leg, etc.) won’t most normal people say, “I’m sorry, what was your name?”

Let me ask you this: would you really want to make a networking connection with someone who was so socially awkward that if they a) didn’t hear your name when you shook hands b) couldn’t clearly read your nametag because it was on the left side of your body and c) refused to ask you to repeat? If so, perhaps you should join a carnival.

Fifth, the world’s leading expert on nametags wears his on the left side. Oh, you didn’t know there was a world’s leading expert on nametags? There is. My friend and fellow speaker Scott Ginsberg is the Nametag Guy. What makes him the expert? Well, as of today, he has worn a nametag all day, everyday, for 3,355 days. Guess what side he wears it on? Yup – the left side.

Scott is such a nametag expert that he even got a tattoo of a nametag on his chest!

Guess what side the tattoo is on. Yup – the left side.

Check it out:

That is hardcore. Hard. Core.

That is hardcore. Hard. Core.

See? Nametag on the left. Tattoo on the left.

So I suppose if you are not the world’s nametag expert, shake hands like a freak, don’t say your name when introduced to somebody, and are in a room with socially awkward people who have immobile eyes, then yes, wearing your nametag on the right side is probably a critical success step.

For the rest of us, I return to my statement: “I wear mine on the left side, but who the hell cares?”

You may be wondering, “Avish, you clearly care because you wrote a whole article on it.”

Actually, I really don’t care. If you wear a nametag on the left side I assume you are normal. If you wear it on the right, I assume that you are either normal and left handed or that you read a networking book somewhere that told you to put it on the right side.

Who knows, putting your nametag on the right side may offer you a 0.001% edge when it comes to networking. And, since it takes almost no more effort to apply the tag to your right as opposed to your left, it’s no big deal.

What annoys me is how this is indicative of a much larger problem I see in the world:

People obsessing over inconsequential details instead of focusing on the fundamentals

I’m no networking expert (in fact, I wrote an article on Networking for People Who Hate Sales and Networking), but I would say, regardless of where you place your nametag, successful networking boils down to a few things:

  1. Be positive and polite
  2. Introduce yourself to people
  3. Be interested in others
  4. Find opportunities to help and connect other people
  5. Don’t sell or push your own agenda
  6. When appropriate, follow up with respect

If you are not successful at networking, chances are you are messing up one or more of the above. If you’re already a master looking for the slightest edge, then sure, go ahead and obsess over the details.

Beyond networking, I see this all the time. In my experience, most people would rather be given 100 tiny little detail techniques they can focus on than 3 or 4 solid fundamentals. I have seen this in martial arts, improv comedy, speaking, sales, leadership, customer service, and beyond…

I once let (my bad!) a customer service training go on a 10 minute tangent on whether the words, “I’m sorry” or “I apologize” were more appropriate. You can not make this stuff up.

Feel free to wear your nametag on whatever side you damn well please. But if you’re looking at an area of your life where you are not having the success you want and deserve, ask yourself, “am I ignoring the fundamentals and focusing on little details that aren’t really important in the grand scheme of things?”

If so, step back, take a breath, and refocus on the big picture. Do that and you will give yourself way more than a 0.001% edge…

Posted in Business Advice, Motivation & Success | Leave a comment