Rest Assured, Stupidity is Alive and Well…

Just in case you happened to be thinking, “hey, people can’t possibly be that stupid, right?” here’s a story that will set you straight:

NM man set on fire after losing drinking bet

Sure, there’s nothing seemingly funny about a guy being set on fire, until you read the story and discover a few things:

1. He was set on fire because he lost a bar bet…
2. To his friends…
3. Who were the ones to set him on fire…
4. Which he agreed to, since he lost the bet

Then the group had a brief moment of clarity and decided to take their friend to the hospital, but they got nervous en route, so they left him on the side of the Interstate!

What

The

Heck?!

Can you imagine the thought conversation between these people?!?

“Hey guys, I got a great idea!” says Tweetledum. “Let’s play a drinking game where we see who can drink the most beer!”

“That sounds great,” says Tweetledumber. “But if we’re going to have a contest, we need to punish the loser!”

“You’re right,” chimes in Tweetledumbass. “But what would be a good, appropriate, fun, socially conscious way of punishing the loser that would still allow us to, um…you know…live at the end of the night?”

The Tweetles stare at each other blankly, like someone had just suggested they take a business etiquette class.

“I got it!” yells Tweetledum. “We can set the loser on fire!”

“Brilliant!” proclaims Tweetledumber

“Agreed!” chimes in Tweetledumbass “Nothing says ‘good times’ like scorching human flesh!”

Cut to the end of the night, after Tweetledumbass has lost the bet by drinking a paltry six beers…

“Well Tweetledumbass, you lost the bet, so now we have to set you on fire.”

“Ok, a bet’s a bet,” says Tweetledumbass. “And I would much rather be true to my word and honor a ludicrous bet than not be set on fire.”

Cut to the car, taking Tweetledumbass to the hospital…

“How far to the hospital guys?” asks Tweetledumbass. “I am in a lot of pain from, you know, being set on fire.”

“Not much further,” says Tweetledum.

“Hey,” says Tweetledumber, “do you think we might get in trouble for setting our friend on fire?”

“Oh,” says Tweetledum. “I hadn’t thought of that. Maybe we didn’t think this whole, “set the loser on fire” thing all the way through.”

“Yeah, I don’t think we should go to the hospital. We’ll get in trouble.”

“Ok, where should we take him?”

“Why don’t we leave him on the side of the road? He’s bound to get help at some point.”

“Perfect! Tweetledumbass, we are going to throw you out of the car here. Someone will come along eventually to help you.”

“What?” says Tweetledumbass. “What are you doing? No, no, stop! Stop pulling me out of the car! Aggh! let me back in. Let me back in! Don’t you dare drive off, don’t you…My God, I can’t believe my good friends, the ones who were so kind and lit me on fire, would be so inconsiderate and leave me on the side of the road. Perhaps I was wrong about ‘scorching human flesh.”

And so, the wheel of stupidity turns on and on and on and on…

Let’s see what we can learn from these Mensa members…

Lesson 1:

Umm…don’t set yourself on fire…?

Lesson 2:

Yeah…uh…don’t set your friends on fire…?

Lesson 3:

Hmmm…how about, “don’t let your friends set you on fire”…?

Lesson 4:

DON’T BE STUPID

Ok, I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you have not wagered to let your friends set you on fire if you drink the least (please let me know if I am incorrect in that assumption – from a safe distance…like 1,000 miles away via email, just to be safe). However, we all do stupid things that get in the way of our own happiness and success. Not all things that hold us back have to involve alcohol, matches, and a 62 IQ. It can be something as simple as saying a thoughtless thing, sending an email you shouldn’t, blowing off an important meeting, or trusting that person you know you shouldn’t.

Life is wrought with enough challenges we to navigate without us doing things to make our lives harder. The next time you are about to do something stupid that will set you back, think back to our New Mexico friends and ask yourself, “would those dunderhead New Mexico pyromaniacs do this?” If the answer is yes, you should really think long and hard about your next step

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