Last night I watched one of the most gloriously awful movies I have ever seen: “Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus.”
This is a direct to DVD release. It has budget CGI. And it stars Lorenzo, “I used to be Renegade,” Lamas and Deborah, “don’t call me Debbie,” Gibson. That my friends is a recipe for sheer b-movie genius. This movie defines the phrase, “so bad it’s good.” The only way it could have been better is if Lamas wore his Renegade sunglasses and if during the romantic interlude (you know there had to be one) Debbie Gibson’s “Only In My Dreams” came on in the background. That, and if it had been made in 3D, which was in fact the original intention for this movie.
You probably haven’t seen this movie. Close your eyes and imagine what a direct to DVD movie titled “Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus” starring Lorenzo Lamas and Debbie Gibson would be like. I have no way of knowing what you are thinking, but I will say that the movie you are imagining is 100% exactly the same as the movie that was made. It is physically impossible to think of anything different when you have a movie so aptly titled and so perfectly cast.
I was watching this movie with a friend who writes music professionally. Every time he watches a movie like this (it happens more than it should), he says, “I would love to write music for these movies.” This got me thinking about the people who work on these b-type direct to DVD (and made for SyFy channel) flicks.
“Mega Shark…” and other movies like it require a lot of people and a decent chunk of money to get made. Those of us used to huge Hollywood blockbusters look at a movie like “Mega Shark…” and call it “budget.” Relative to the money spent on making the awful Transformers 2, for example, the budget for “Mega Shark…” looks like pocket change. But this is a full movie that employs a lot of people There are lots of people who make a living working on these “budget” projects.
I have no doubt that my friend would love to work on these movies. You know why? Because he loves the process of writing music. While others might be embarrassed to work on these flicks or just see them as a necessarily evil stepping stone, he would love it.
There’s a lesson here:
Process, Not Product
You know you are going to think about this every time you cross the Golden Gate bridge - or any bridge, for that matter!
Many people pursue a goal thinking only about the end result. This is not a problem as a means of motivation, but for a large goal you need to make sure you enjoy the process.
You may want to be a “glamorous” Hollywood star, but if you don’t love acting, you’ll never be able to put in the countless hours auditioning and acting in the small projects leading up to your big break. You may love the idea of owning a successful company, but if you don’t love the process of building and running a business, it ain’t gonna happen. Want to lose weight but haven’t gotten yourself to enjoy exercise and eating healthy? You may drop the pounds, but you’ll either gain them back or struggle to keep them off for your entire life.
For me, I love speaking and making people laugh. I know this, because I have performed comedy for amazing huge crowds, tiny awful crowds, and everything in between. I have gotten my full fee to speak for an hour at a venue ten minutes from my house, and I once drove seven hours to speak to a group of twenty people for free. I love speaking, and I love making people laugh. I love the process.
This is not to say that you shouldn’t reach for the brass ring, if that’s what you want. I know I do. Just make sure that you’ll will love taking the steps that will get you there. If not, you should reconsider the goal or find a way of adjusting the process that gets you there. Otherwise you are setting yourself up for some serious headache and failure.
If you were a composer, would you love writing the score for “Mega Shark…” just because you love writing music? If not, what process would you like?
Put another way, for your dreams, what’s your “Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus?”
P.S. Here’s a treat for you – the gloriously awful trailer for “Mega Shark”:
I HAVE to see this! It could be better than Plan 9 from Outer Space!
Is the SHARK actually biting the Golden Gate????
Oh yes, the Mega Shark eats the Golden Gate Bridge…brilliant!!
Last night, I watched another winner on Hulu (Mega Shark was, by far, a superior flick): “The Empire of the Ants”. Joan Collins is the “big star”. Radioactive waste meets an ant colony meets a bunch of unsuspecting tourists meets terrible sound effects. I’m fairly certain they did not have the same effects budget as Shark/Octopus. Then again, it was done way before CGI, so… Anyway, here’s the link, if anyone wants to lose the next 90 minutes of their life: http://www.hulu.com/watch/14125/empire-of-the-ants
Brilliant! I love B-Grade Sci-fi and Disaster flicks.
What exactly does it say about one’s cinematic work when the phrase, “Mega Shark was, by far, a superior flick?” 🙂
thanks for the movie mention – I don’t know if I can bring myself to watch that though…
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