A Game of Morons: The Importance of Picking Your Battles

Have you ever gotten really mad over something really stupid, and then did something you really regretted?

If so, don’t feel too bad. There are people making far, far worse decisions about far, far more inconsequential things…

For example, I came across a story recently about a man who was arrested for throwing his cousin out of a window.

What prompted this altercation? What could make one man throw another through a window? Where they arguing over the love of a woman? Debating the geo-political ramifications of oil and religion in the Middle East? Fighting for control of a detonator for a thermo-nuclear device?

No. No, no, no. These two were not arguing about anything so passive, so simple, so banal. They were arguing over something that truly mattered:

I’m sure you’ve figured it out by now (how could you not? It’s so obvious). They were arguing over which characters on a fantasy TV show were going to win a battle.

Wait, what?!?

Yes, these two scholars were fans of the HBO TV show, Game of Thrones.

Read it for yourself:

Man Throws Cousin Through Window Debating ‘Game of Thrones’

Game of Thrones is an HBO show based on a fantasy novel series. I’ve read it (I’m guessing our two violent blockheads haven’t – they probably wouldn’t know what a book was if one came flying out a window and hit them in them head), and while I would say it’s good, I can’t say that I think it’s so good that it would ever prompt me to hurl my cousin (or any other family member for that matter) through a window.

Of course, I’ve only read the first two books so far (they’re up to five, and the finished series will have seven or so), so who knows? Maybe book four is so well written it motivates its readers to commit familial defenestration.

I think that should be the new rating system for books. Screw this “out of five stars” thing. Let’s rate books on a “potential to cause violence” scale.

This would make book reviews so much more entertaining. “The book was pretty good, but I can’t say it made me want to throw my cousin through a window,” or, “wow! A book so good, you’ll find yourself whacking your neighbor in the head with a garden gnome after you read it!” Who wouldn’t want that?

But I digress…

So we have Tweedledum and Tweedledee arguing over fictional characters in a fantasy world, and the argument gets so heated that they get into a fight. During the course of the fight, one throws the other through a window while yelling “Tyrion Lannister in the face, beyatch!”

(Ok, I’ll admit it, I added that last part…).

What can we learn from this? First off, we can learn to never watch Game of Thrones with morons.

Beyond that, I think there are three lessons we can all takeaway from this story:

Develop Impulse Control

The more speaking I do and the more blog posts and books I write, the more convinced I become of the importance of impulse control

What is impulse control? Here’s a good definition from TheFreeDictionary.com:

Psychology The degree to which a person can control the desire for immediate gratification or other; IC may be the single most important indicator of a person’s future adaptation in terms of number of friends, school performance and future employment

I honestly believe that if we, adults and children alike, could learn to control our immediate reflexive responses, the world would be a better place.

This is one of the main points of my keynote speeches – how to make better choices reflexively, in the moment; choices that reduce stress and keep you on track, even when things go wrong. Such a simple thing, but so important.

Anyone who lets an argument about a TV show escalate to physical violence clearly lacks impulse control.

While I am sure that you are smart enough to not get into a physical alteration over television, I would bet that there are times when high emotions take over and you make bad choices and take less than ideal actions.

Impulse control isn’t easy; it takes conscious practice to get better at it. But the better you do it, the lower your stress levels will be, the better your relationships will be, and you will make better and faster progress towards all your goals.

Pick Your Battles

Let me repeat the critical point of this story: One man threw another man through a window because they were arguing over which character would win a battle on a fantasy TV show.

If that doesn’t make you think that some people need to learn some perspective, I can do nothing for you.

Pick your battles, people. Not every discussion needs to be entered into. Not every argument needs to be won. Just because you got into a conflict doesn’t mean you can’t get out of it, even if you will appear to be “losing.”

So yes, if someone is unfairly accusing you of sexual harassment, then fight to the bitter end to defend your job, name, and honor. But if you’re a “Kirk” guy and you come across a rabid “Picard,” guy, feel free to walk away from that before it comes to fisticuffs (now, if you come across a rabid “Janeway” guy, you may be justified in resorting to violence. I’m just saying…)

Nip Things in the Bud

In most situations, people don’t instantaneously switch from totally calm to violently outraged (not even these two Mensa graduates).  Things progress one step at a time with the argument getting more and more heated as it goes, until the only option left is to throw a person through a window.

At any point during the discussion, either person could have said, “ok, let’s just agree to disagree.” They could have continued finished watching Game of Thrones and then gone on to argue over other Earth-shattering topics, like who would win in a fight, Thor or the Hulk (Thor) or which Lord of the Rings character was the most “badass” (Aragorn).

Now I realize that neither of these two Bozos would have the maturity and self control to make such a statement. But how about you? How often do you start off in a minor disagreement that slowly escalates until, by the end, you are in a full blown war? In those situations, wouldn’t you say that you had moments where you though to yourself, “hmm, this is getting a bit out of hand?”

Whether your arguing with family, friends, work colleagues, supervisors, or a significant other, your ability to look just a few steps ahead, realize things are headed in a bad direction, and nip the argument in the bud by simply walking away will allow you to live much happier, healthier, and wealthier life.

In Conclusion

A little thought, foresight, and impulse control go a long way. While I am sure you would never throw someone through a window over an argument about a TV show, I hope you can learn a few things from the two dunderheads who did. Life is too short to get worked up and out of control over stupid things. Pick your battles, exert a little control, and be willing to walk away.

And the next time you feel an argument starting to get just a little out of hand, picture a 23 year old idiot throwing his cousing out a window while yelling, “Tyrion Lannister  in the face, beyatch!”

***

Want to book that would rank high on the “potential to cause violence scale”? Then check out Avish’s “Improvise to Success” – now available on Amazon!

About

By Avish Parashar. As the world's only Motivational Improviser, Avish uses techniques from the world of improv comedy to engage, entertain, and educate audiences on ideas around change, creativity, and motivation. Connect with Avish on Google+

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