Motivational Humor: Move. Move! MOVE!!

Have you ever been confounded simply by the way someone was walking in front of you? I have…

I was taking a train to Metuchen, NJ this past weekend. This is not a stop I usually get off at, nor even a train route I normally take. As we leave the station immediately before Metuchen the conductor comes on the PA system and says, “the last four cars will not be up to the platform, so if you are getting off, move to the front.”

I’ll be honest, when I got on the train I had no idea at all what car I was in. All I knew is that I was not in the first car or last; other than that, I had nothin’. I accepted the possibility that I was in the last four cars, but thought I could figure it out at the station.

A few minutes later, the train slows and stops. I look out the window and I see no platform. The weird thing was that at no point did conductor, on the PA or in person, say, “now arriving at Metuchen.” I wasn’t sure if we were at the station or just stopped temporarily on the tracks.

Not wanting to miss my stop, I look down the aisle. At the nearest door in front of me, a few guys are standing waiting. I look beyond them, however, and get the sense that people are getting off the train. Uh-oh…

I spring up and start moving quickly forward. As I get to the first door (with the guys who were just standing there), it seems that one of the guys gets the same idea I did. Sort of…

You see, he does one of those, “half uncertain meandering walks” where he slowly starts walking forward trying to figure out if this is his stop or not.

I don’t know if you gave been on a train recently, but if not, there are two things you should know:

1. The aisles aren’t really wide enough for passing.
2. They don’t stop for very long at the stations.

Now I’m stuck behind this doofus who is slowly, indecisively, ambling forward, still trying to figure out whether we are at his station.

We are still kind of moving forward, so I am torn between a) tapping him on the shoulder and saying, “excuse me, this is my stop,” b) saying, “excuse me” and pushing past him, c) saying, “excuse me, but would you MOVE YOUR !@#$%^* @$$” while I smacked him in the head.

Just as I am about to pick one of those options (I won’t tell you which one), this Mensa candidate seems to finally realize, “hey, I think this is the station, I better pick it up and move!” I honestly feel I could actually see a light bulb go off in his head.

Fortunately, he figured it out in time and we both got safely off the train. Probably less than 30 seconds later, the train doors closed behind us. I have to say, I was more than a little annoyed at this guy.

As I walked down the platform to meet my ride, I started thinking about the whole situation. Here are three things I think we can all takeaway from my experience with this master of dumbiosity:

Make a Decision!

This is one of those things that infuriates me to no end. Why is it so hard for some people to make a decision? I get it; some decisions are so important that if you mess it, things can go seriously wrong. Most decisions in our lives are not like that.

Unless you are trying to diffuse a bomb and need to decide between cutting the red or blue wire, chances are your decision isn’t a life or death matter. Sure, we all have life changing decisions to make from time to time (do I buy this house, do I take this new job across the country, do I get married, etc), but those types of decisions come along once in a rare while.

What I am talking about are the teeny tiny decisions we face everyday: What do I eat for dinner? Do I turn right or left at this intersection? Should I buy this shirt or not? Do I accept this invite to a friend’s party? Where do I go on vacation this year? And yes, “do I walk forward on this train to see if this is my stop?”

So many people add stress to their lives by being unable or unwilling to make decisions. The problem is that people are so afraid not only to make a wrong decision, but also to make the less than best decision. This is a recipe for useless torment.

It doesn’t need to be that hard. Make a quick assessment. Decide on a choice. Moce forward. If it doesn’t work fix it, change choices, and move on.

Pay Attention!

I suppose it was possible that he didn’t know that the station platform didn’t reach the last four cars of the train. But if he didn’t, he only had himself to blame! I never take this train route, and I knew it. Everyone else seemed to know it. The only reason he could not know it is if he was simply not paying attention to the announcements.

This is the kind of stupidity and idiocy that drives me crazy (and that I write about on this blog). Not intelligence, or IQ, or grades, or degrees. But rather the simple stupidity born from illogic, a lack of common sense, and the inability to pay attention. If you want to avoid stupid mistakes, start by paying more attention.

Be Assertive!

Here is where I say, mea culpa. At the end of this story, had I missed my station, I would only have myself to blame. Don’t get me wrong, I’d blame the heck out of the guy in front of me, and write a blog post ranting about it, but it would have ultimately been my responsibility.

I could have moved to the front of the train immediately upon hearing the announcement. I could have asked someone if they knew which car we were on. And, most importantly, I could have immediately pointed out to the guy that this was my stop and I needed to get off.

I’m all for being polite, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be assertive sometimes when needed.

Things don’t need to be that complicated. Pay attention, make a decision, and be assertive. Do those three simple things, and you’ll get a lot farther in life (and miss fewer train stops…)

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