You Talking to Me?

A few days ago I posted about my experience of going to Lowe’s to buy a pipe snake. I left out a short but weird experience that made me think about the way the world communicates…

I was standing in the “plumbing” aisle looking at the various tools I could use to unclog my drain. A few minutes later, a man walks into the aisle, and when he’s a few feet away from me starts saying, “drain pipes. Drain pipes. Where are the drain pipes.” Clearly this is a man looking to buy a drain pipe.

The thing was though, he was saying this pretty loud. Not shouting loud, but conversational loud. He wasn’t just muttering this to himself.

So I am standing there with my back to him, trying to figure out if he is asking me where the drain pipes are or if he is just loudly talking to himself. I had no answer, but I was hoping he wasn’t speaking to me. He didn’t strike me as someone I would want to strike up a conversation with (why is it never a beautiful women who accosts me in public? Nope. Always a weird dude…). Yes, that may be judgmental, but to be fair, “talking to yourself at full volume in public” is a pretty good way to pre-qualify people out of my life.

Like any good improviser I stood there frozen. I was hoping that he, like a Jurassic Park T-Rex would be unable to see me if I didn’t move. After 20 or 30 seconds he left and I let out a deep breath I didn’t realize I was holding. I continue my scoping out of tools, when he suddenly comes back into my aisle. Blast!

On the plus side, his reappearance moved me out of my indecision on what to buy. I just picked the tool I initially thought was best and made straight for the checkout, lest he confuse me with his pseudo-self talk again.

This was one of the situations that makes me look at the world and say, “why?” I realize that he didn’t do anything wrong, and in the grand scheme of things if that’s the worst experience I ever have while shopping I am pretty lucky. But as a guy who writes and speaks on communication quite a bit, I couldn’t help but ask, “why?”

What compels a person to a) verbalize their internal thoughts and b) do it at a volume that disturbs or accidentally engages nearby people?

I suppose that in a world where people are so brazen as to talk full volume on their cell phones while walking down a sidewalk, on a crowded train, or worst of all, in a movie theater during a movie, this should not be a surprise.

But for those of you reading his blog, all I ask is that, before you open your mouth, you give half a second of thought to what you are going to say, how loud you will say it, who is around, and whether it is polite or necessary for you to proceed.

Is that too much to ask?